~I'm tired of the backaches I'm having

~I have to forever lower my standards for what and who I want to be while having to forever buy bigger clothes.

~I'm afraid that when people look at me, all they can see is my weight. This is of special concern when I'm in restaurants, and I'm paranoid that my waiter either wants to or is mocking me behind my back for my food choices.

~Sex may be good with my husband, but I'm always ashamed of how how I look to him. As good as he is to me, he deserves the best in the world, and I always feel that, the shape I am...I can't be it. I know in my head that I am OK, I am acceptable, and even better, but it's still something I struggle with.

~I'm always ashamed when I go to the gym, especially the other day at the pool, when we were there at the same time as the water arobics class, and every one of them was thinner than I.

This is a GREAT thread !

Airline Seats! I love to travel, but I have always dreaded flying because the seats were very uncomfortable, I always had to get a belt extender, and I often felt bad for those sitting next to me. (depending on the person, if you know what I mean! )

ADLs (Activities of Daily Living)- I find that the more weight I lose, the easier it is to walk, move, sit, excersize, go to theaters, plays, concerts, play with my kids, enjoy my hobbies, move around the boat, etc.

As said before...Clothes Shopping! I am tired of having to have to go to Big and Tall Stores or Mail Order Shop. I resent having to pay large amounts of money for clothes of inferior quality. I hate paying exorbanant prices for large clothes of decent quality ($50 for Dockers) I am happt that I am finally reaching the upper limit of what some store seem to consider "normal size" (XL Shirt and 44-46" waist).

I am tired of "the look". (Even though I am quite good at what I do, I never could appreciate the idea that I was considered to be lazy, stupid, or un-motivated until proven otherwise.

I resent the wear and tear I have subjected my poor body to over the years. Back Pain, Twisted Ankles, Heel Spurs, Poor Conditioning, Ungainly falls, etc...

I could go on, but you get the idea. I have lost alot, and I have a long way to go! But at this time, It's nice to know that travel is easier, choices in clothes are getting better, and I am beginning to enjoy being active again.

Not to ever be in a dead sleep again

""I am working my hardest ever to get this weight off and restart my life. Untill I started my weight loss journey this time I was pretty much house bound. If I couldn't do it from here I wouldn't do it at all nor would I want to. I lost interest in all the things I once found so enjoyable. I isolated in my home and only entertained family. I lost touch with all my friends telling myself that it was time to move on anyway, a sick way of justifying to myself why I was pushing wonderful people out of my life. That was a very dark and empty and lonely place. I think now as I look back at it that it was a growing point for me. I needed to go through that to really see how much of this blessing called life I was wasting. God gave me a beautiful gift and I was throwing it away as if it didn't matter or at least not as much as sitting alone in the dark eating out of control. I found a way of eating that allows me freedom form that compulsion and I feel so very blessed to be able to see the light again and feel the sun on my face. It is as if a stormy cloud has passed over and allowed the brilliant sun to burst through and bath me in a wonderful blissful light called life. I can see and feel happiness again and I am so thankfull I finally woke from my dead sleep before it was too late.""

I still got a long way to go but I am on my way to life!!

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Donald, way to go on losing 47lbs so far !! Wicked !
I would like to know what your plan is and do you incorporate exercise into the plan ?

Some of my reasons I hate being FAT!

1) Afraid to go on long flights to exotic places because I am so big and have to sit in a small airplane seat for several hours.

2) Having to determine if a rental car is gonna me big enough for me to sit in. (I've had to go back into the office and get another a few times.... not fun at all !

3) Having limited energy to do what I really like to do - Hiking, etc.

4) Of course, the restaurant booth vs the table scenaro.. Arrggh!

5) Not have the availability of nice, classy clothes to choose from in malls.

6) Being concerned about going to the beach because of the looks people give me

7) Being in stores and having clerks ingore me as if I wasn't there.

8) Excessive sweating when it's hot... that drives me mad ...

Welll, I can go on and on and on and on... like an Ever-Ready battery about this topic.....

That's why we're all trying to lose wieght. and by God, Im gonna be in good shape again if it kills me !!

Take care and good luck everyone !
Craig

I agree with texas on the trip thing. One thing that always prevents me from going somewhere nice and warm, is the expectation of wandering around in a bathing suit (not a pretty picture!) And of course...participating in water sports (look at that fatty giggle when she runs etc etc!)

Even when we went to Europe, it was a bit awkard (NA is the place where obesity is now 50% of the population-its growing in europe but its not as common......yet) It was VERY obvious that I stood out from the crowd - well, not from the crowd of tourists who were mostly from NA!.

I really enjoyed reading all the threads, many rang very true. I read an article in the Utne Reader which is an alternative press magazine (its a great read to those of you who are bohemian academic types!) The name of the article is"Fat Nation" Our Obesity Issue is an Issue of Public Health, not Personal Virtue: Utne Reader March-April 2002 www.utne.com (it may be online)
It also has a great quote that I would like to share, and I'll be putting it on my tag, it really says it all:

"When thin actors put on a fat suit, its like when a white actor puts on a blackface....Its a simple case of "Lets all laugh at the last safe prejudice in this society."...which is fat people. (Frances White, National Association to Advance Fat Acceptance, Talk Dec 2000 )

Why I Hate Being Fat

1. I feel heavy, bogged down and burdened
2. I have to worry if I'm going to break a chair when I sit in it, or if I will actually fit in it.
3. I want to throw up everytime I put a swimsuit on
4. I have cellulite
5. I hate the stares I get from people
6. I feel guilty each time I eat and when I go out to eat, I feel like people are looking at me thinking "she's fat, why is she eating"
7. I have rolls that really aren't supposed to be on my body
8. Diabetes runs in my family, and by being overweight, I greatly increase my chances of getting it
9. I have ugly stretch marks on my skin
10. I can't wear the cute clothes I want to wear, I have to buy the unfashionable PLUS size clothes (they have made strides to make more fashionable plus size clothes, but it's not the same)
11. I want to be able to run, and walk, and dance, without getting out of breath so quickly.
12. I want to be able to wear short tops and expose my belly button in the summer, without having a huge bulge where my belly is
13. People that judge me before they even know who I am, because I am fat
14. Having to feel guilty everytime I eat because I am fat
15. Going to the doctor's having to hear EVERY time "you need to lose weight"
16. Having to get weighed at the doctor's office and be reminded how fat I am
17. Because of being fat, having self esteem issues
18. Hearing skinny people complain that they are "fat"
19. Walking up stairs
20. Elevators


Gah there's SO much more! I hate being fat, and I'm not going to be fat anymore!

Tuesday marks 2 MONTHS of being on the Atkin's Diet

HOOOORAY!!!

Keep up the good work everyone.. I know we can do it

Brianna

Tazmani77 I was so on my way to where you are telling my you have been!!! So many times I've been tempted to tell my friends I just couldn't make it here or there. They are all thin (of course) except me. It's just getting too hard to get the kids ready and try to find my TENT FOR THE DAY, and frankly I am just really embarrased. I wonder what they say about my weight behind my back. We are all very close, but like all of us, they want to go to the beach with the kids, take the kids biking, etc. All of this is becoming too taxing on my 5'5" 245 lb frame!!!

So truly, I am so close to staying home more and just not making the playgroup dates like I use to. Gosh, it's scary when I think about how much I've let myself go. I just can't figure out why I kept going. But truly a light has come on. I realize just how disfigured I am and I want to get back to the real me.

I truly appreciated your post. I understand so very much what you said!

Okay, I'll join in!

The things I hate most about being overweight? There are many, but I'll start with a few key ones.

1) Lack of energy. This is the big one which cuts into so many things in life, the worst result being that I never can keep up on the daily things that *need* doing.

2) Lack of co-ordination. The excess weight causes my body to be unwieldy, unbalanced & inflexible (hampers many physical activities, including my sex life & my attempts to learn inline skating!).

3) Lack of confidence. My self-worth is in the toilet and I fear social interaction even though I have to be social every day at my job. My shyness & unease when I'm around people is *directly* linked to my insecurity over my weight. I know from first-hand experience that "society" holds overweight people in contempt; I'm forever dreading the next hurtful rejection or put-down (verbal OR tacitly implicit) and so try whenever possible to avoid people to circumvent the possibility entirely. I actually suffered from agoraphobia for a few years in the late 90's.

4) I hate having to wear "fat" clothes! This might seem like the least of my issues here, but good LORD am I sick and tired of shopping at flippin' Lane Bryant and Catherine's Plus Sizes and the "womens" clothing areas at other stores! I'm tired of feeling that I have to hide in baggy clothing! I want to be able to shop at "normal" clothing places that are everywhere, I want to wear fitted garments & look great in them, and ESPECIALLY I want to wear gorgeous sexy things and FEEL sexy in them!

5) I'm TIRED of being invisible to men. I want to be sexually attractive NOW, and *not* only when a guy gets to know me over the course of months or years. Again, I'm sure this may seem pretty superficial, but I'm human, NOT an android and I feel this need quite keenly. Don't assume I'm single & desperate, either...I'm neither.

Well, that should do for now.


-- Nicky

I have to admit that I've answered this question before, posed by starchile a few months ago, but if it was good the first time, repeats don't kill....



Elora Jade-- utne reader is one of my favourites! I saw that issue but didn't have time to buy. Thanks for reminding me. Another great magazine that takes on such issues (especially when it comes to women and the media) is Bitch. http://www.bitchmagazine.com/ (Sorry if this offends anyone. Yes, it is a real mag and it is the real name.) They have also dealt with the fat suit and fat bigotry in past issues. In the recent "Hollywood's Big New Minstrel Show" (issue no. 15), they trounced the movie "Shallow Hal." Made me proud.

I hate being fat for all the reasons you all have posted :
I also hate being fat and feeling I have to hide when I eat because people are staring. Or people are looking in my shopping cart to see what I am buying.
I hate being fat because people naturally assume that you are weak and have no self control.
I hate being fat and hearing since I was a child " You have such a pretty face. but..........." As if somehow I was defective or never quite good enough.
I hate seeing my daughter heavy and knowing what she is in for. For the dances and proms she might not get to go to . For people judging her not for the person she is but for the outer package.
As far as my DH- he is a love . And amazingly he has always made me feel sexy. Even at 286. It was my own mind that made me not feel attractive. Although I must admit since he has been on this wol and has lost 50 and I have lost 60 . Romance is a little easier without both of our belly's creating a big distance between us.

Yes, I am ready to be skinny and having great sex again....

Guys just don't seem to go for the X-Large variety! So I am ready to be thin and vamp them all.



Dee

I'm just too tired of being too Short. I'm 6'6" and still weigh 567 lbs. I figure if I could just get to 13"7" that I would look Fine. But I guess that can't happen so I will be glad when I can get the next 267 pounds off then it will open a Whole New World of Freedom from my Fat Body with all of it's Handicapps it carries with it.

Well, I really thought everyone would have all the hates covered, but I thought of a few more...

I hate being somewhere in public and hearing a child say something like, "Hey mom, look at that fat man." I have nothing against the child mind you, but it still hurts.

I hate being sick so often. I'm not sure others will relate to this, but it just seems that any cold or flu that comes down the pike ends up parking at my door. Is this just me?

I hate being only a spectator of sporting activities. I want to get in the game.

I hate not being able to go swimming because I don't want to take my shirt off.

I hate having 10 different sizes of pants in my closet.

I hate mail ordering clothing and it never fitting just right.

I hate driving a huge car when I'd really like to drive a sporty model.

I hate good intentioned people telling me how they lost 5lbs and how it would work for me.

I hate watching a movie and relating to the fat friend of the lead character when I actually want to be the star.

I hate hiding from cameras because I don't want to be reminded what I really look like. I hate that I'm the only one in our family who takes photos and that I'm conspicuously absent from our family photo albums and videos.

I hate that I'm not a better lover for my wife.

I hate accepting professional limits that wouldn't be there if I wasn't fat.

Well this has been a cathartic experience. You know if you just read the list, it sounds really depressing. But with each day that passes in my new WOL I gain hope and faith. As I wrote each of the items above I was and am filled with hope that these reflect my current state and are not a life sentence.

I know that losing weight does not solve all of life's problems. But there are SOOOOOOOOOOOOOO many reasons to look forward to where our new WOLs are taking us.

God Bless you all

The difference between casual posting and posting from the heart...

...is clearly illustrated by Jim's previous post. After reading it a few times (and also thinking we must have had them all covered by now) I find myself incredibly moved and sort of choking back tears at my desk. It truly touched a nerve...

I'm not only happy, but really proud to be a member of this group. That we can share so freely and openly is a very good thing.

Donald

I am new in triple digits and I certainly hate being fat.
I went to a musical my granddaughter was in this past weekend. When I went to set down I could here the mumbles behind me about how they weren't going to be able to see around me. I was so upset
I told my kids that I thought I would go set in the back so I could have more room.
Another time I was in Wal-marts and this young boy about 7 yrs. old or so said to his mother, did you see that fat woman over there with the rings on. I was so embarrased I just wanted to get out of there.
I also hate it when people ask how much weight I've lost. They are only interested in how much I actually weighed. I've heard people say that is like losing a whole person, how can they let their self get like that.
Thanks for letting me sound off.
Sandy...Go brighten someone's day.