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  #61   ^
Old Sat, Feb-11-06, 12:47
Duparc's Avatar
Duparc Duparc is offline
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Posts: 586
 
Plan: self-designed
Stats: 216/189/190 Male tad under 6'
BF:
Progress: 104%
Location: Kirriemuir, Scotland
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I cannot recall being called any names owing to my weight; at 6' tall who's got the courage?

I do, however, recollect while as a youngster (sevenish, possibly) when at a children's party having to stand and shout aloud in front of an audience of other children, "I'm my mammy's big tumshie (turnip in plain English)! It embarrassed me terribly and amazingly, the memory today continues to have a slight effect so who's sensitive?

Last edited by Duparc : Sat, Feb-11-06 at 13:08.
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  #62   ^
Old Sat, Feb-11-06, 13:40
TheCaveman's Avatar
TheCaveman TheCaveman is offline
Registered Member
Posts: 1,429
 
Plan: Angry Paleo
Stats: 375/205/180 Male 6'3"
BF:
Progress: 87%
Location: Sacramento, CA
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Duparc
I cannot recall being called any names owing to my weight; at 6' tall who's got the courage?


I didn't get many comments either, and probably because I'm tall and appear to be on the verge of random physical violence at all times anyway.

But one time. I was walking down the street, minding my own business, and a car full of young gents drove by, and one stuck his head out the window and yelled "Soloflex, fatass!"

I immediately yelled back "Guillotine, idiot!"

For a few moments I was quite pleased with my snappy response, and then came to my senses and ducked into an alley.
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  #63   ^
Old Sat, Feb-11-06, 13:59
MrsSchaaff's Avatar
MrsSchaaff MrsSchaaff is offline
Senior Member
Posts: 118
 
Plan: SBD
Stats: 146/136/125 Female 67"
BF:
Progress: 48%
Location: New Hampshire
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the meanest thing anyone ever said...was actually when I was about 20 years old...I was the geeky girl in highschool....I had my own style...did NOT follow the norm, and I went to a prep school where that was just not acceptable. My highschool years were spent in tears...switching classes to get away from the bullies that terrorized me only to find a new one in each class. High school was its own form of hell....BUT

The worst that anyone ever said was when I ran into the ringleader...the worst "boy" from highschool...I was 20 years old and thought we were both adults...so I asked him WHY?? WHY?? did you put me thru that...why did you spend your days making fun of me...

His nonchalant answer..."cuz I knew I could make you cry. It was easy, so why would I have stopped?"

To me it is incomprehensible. People like this will never understand the impact they have.
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  #64   ^
Old Sat, Feb-11-06, 14:07
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penelope penelope is offline
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Posts: 10,098
 
Plan: Controlled carbs
Stats: 218/195/150 Female 62"
BF:
Progress: 34%
Location: Alberta
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At 12, I went from being a very skinny girl to an overweight one in 6 months. This was so fast, a pre puberty thing.
I went to the local swimming pool and as I jumped in the water someone screamed Watched out, baby whale.
I even looked around. I did not know they were talking about me for a minute. I cannot explain the shattering effect this had on me.
I lost all confidence instantly.
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  #65   ^
Old Sat, Feb-11-06, 16:07
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potatofree potatofree is offline
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Posts: 17,245
 
Plan: Back to Atkins
Stats: 298/228/160 Female 5ft9in
BF:?/35/?
Progress: 51%
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There's just something about being ridiculed or insulted because of one's weight that is just different than any other form of criticism. What other physical "deformity" is so often blamed on the person carrying it?

I suppose it's because it appears to be brought on by the person themselves, so it's okay in the minds of some people to abuse the "fatty". After all, it's their fault!

The same people mocking the obese would somehow never think to abuse someone in a wheelchair, even if they're IN the chair due to their own actions, like drunk driving or something like that. (Okay, SOME still would!) I suppose they go right for the ones they sense already feel bad enough not to fight back, and those who other people won't jump in to protect.

The ones who make "helpful" comments about your weight are just abusers who are better at hiding their motives than the drive-by "LARDASS"-ers. They just need to rationalize their behavior so they don't feel as bad as the person they're "helping" feels when they're done.
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  #66   ^
Old Sat, Feb-11-06, 20:40
Wildflowr6's Avatar
Wildflowr6 Wildflowr6 is offline
Always Shining
Posts: 1,932
 
Plan: Atkins
Stats: 363.3/332.6/145 Female 5'7"
BF:'fraid so...
Progress: 14%
Location: Virginiaaahhh
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TheCaveman
But one time. I was walking down the street, minding my own business, and a car full of young gents drove by, and one stuck his head out the window and yelled "Soloflex, fatass!"

I immediately yelled back "Guillotine, idiot!"


Bravo! That's priceless!!!

I don't recall being called anything because of my weight, but I was always a skinny kid, and a skinny young adult for that matter, 120 or so at 5'7"

However, just a couple of weeks ago, as I was changing to go swim at the club, some young girls were behind me, whispering and giggling. Since they stopped when I turned around, I'm sure I was the source of amusment.

...it didn't feel good
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  #67   ^
Old Sat, Feb-11-06, 22:19
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potatofree potatofree is offline
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Posts: 17,245
 
Plan: Back to Atkins
Stats: 298/228/160 Female 5ft9in
BF:?/35/?
Progress: 51%
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You know, sometimes when I hear the whispers and giggles I wonder if what they're really saying is as bad as what I'm imagining. It's the not KNOWING that really plays on my mind. I'd almost rather have them just come out and SAY it if they can't just be decent and keep their traps shut.
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  #68   ^
Old Sun, Feb-12-06, 06:43
Wildflowr6's Avatar
Wildflowr6 Wildflowr6 is offline
Always Shining
Posts: 1,932
 
Plan: Atkins
Stats: 363.3/332.6/145 Female 5'7"
BF:'fraid so...
Progress: 14%
Location: Virginiaaahhh
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Quote:
Originally Posted by potatofree
You know, sometimes when I hear the whispers and giggles I wonder if what they're really saying is as bad as what I'm imagining. It's the not KNOWING that really plays on my mind. I'd almost rather have them just come out and SAY it if they can't just be decent and keep their traps shut.

You are absolutely right, and it is possible that it wasn't about me at all, or that it wasn't as bad as I was imagining. In any case, they were just kids, and IF they were talking about me, then perhaps when I turned around (smiling, not scowling).....then maybe a little guilt hit, and they'll be more tolerant of those who don't have perfect bodies. Well.......I can hope, anyway.
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  #69   ^
Old Sun, Feb-12-06, 06:48
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camaromom camaromom is offline
Senior Member
Posts: 5,280
 
Plan: Atkins/lowering cals
Stats: 187/143.6/135 Female 64
BF:35.2/ 20%/20%
Progress: 83%
Location: Lafayette, IN
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OMG! I too have avoided this thread, because it is too painful to even know where to start.
I was born with a hip problem and I've always limped very badly due to one leg being shorter than the other one. I was teased mercilessly about that. Gimpy, Eileen (I lean), hop a long etc.
Then because of the bad hip I wasn't really able to exercise so then I developed a weight problem. Fatty, fat arse etc. An ex boyfriend told me one day to throw my weight into it when I was trying to shut a door. My ex-husband used to tell me all the time that I was fat and lazy - hence why he is my ex.
Probably the worst for me is the fact that I have a torn rectus abdominus since having twins 14 years ago. For 10 years after that I struggled with infertility and people would always ask me when my baby was due despite the fact I wasn't pregnant.
Most currently I have lost my weight and I still have insensitive witches who ask when my baby is due. It is extremely hurtful. DH doesn't want me to have a tummy tuck, but with the ruined muscles it doesn't seem to matter how many hours I put in at the gym I still have a protruding abdomen. Take it from me NEVER as a woman when her baby is due unless you know 100% she is pregnant. This is especially true around Lafayette Indiana because I'm seriously considering physical assault on the next person who asks that.

Sorry so long.
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  #70   ^
Old Sun, Feb-12-06, 08:29
Jonahsafta Jonahsafta is offline
Senior Member
Posts: 1,304
 
Plan: Atkins
Stats: 248/149.2/148 Female 69 inches
BF:
Progress: 99%
Location: Las Vegas
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Is there anything good coming out of this thread???

There is an incredible amt of pain in these posts..(((All))
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  #71   ^
Old Sun, Feb-12-06, 09:33
Wildflowr6's Avatar
Wildflowr6 Wildflowr6 is offline
Always Shining
Posts: 1,932
 
Plan: Atkins
Stats: 363.3/332.6/145 Female 5'7"
BF:'fraid so...
Progress: 14%
Location: Virginiaaahhh
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Jonahsafta
Is there anything good coming out of this thread???

There is an incredible amt of pain in these posts..(((All))

Sometimes talking about painful things can be cathartic, especially when you see that so many others have suffered in the same way, and offer support to you.
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  #72   ^
Old Sun, Feb-12-06, 09:38
Wildflowr6's Avatar
Wildflowr6 Wildflowr6 is offline
Always Shining
Posts: 1,932
 
Plan: Atkins
Stats: 363.3/332.6/145 Female 5'7"
BF:'fraid so...
Progress: 14%
Location: Virginiaaahhh
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Quote:
Originally Posted by camaromom
Take it from me NEVER as a woman when her baby is due unless you know 100% she is pregnant.

Dave Barry agrees........

You should never say anything to a woman that even remotely suggests that you think she's pregnant unless you can see an actual baby emerging from her at that moment. ~Dave Barry, "Things That It Took Me 50 Years to Learn"
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  #73   ^
Old Sun, Feb-12-06, 13:06
potatofree's Avatar
potatofree potatofree is offline
Fully Caffeinated
Posts: 17,245
 
Plan: Back to Atkins
Stats: 298/228/160 Female 5ft9in
BF:?/35/?
Progress: 51%
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Gotta love Dave. About a week after my son was born, I got asked when my baby was due. To this DAY, I can still make that person blush by mentioning it.

And yes, I think there IS something good about this thread. Getting the hurt out into the light of day and discussing it, instead of keeping it inside, eating away at us can be freeing. It all depends on what a person chooses to do with it once it's brought up. I mean, you can pick it apart and destroy it in the light of day, or you can keep taking it out and feeling it all over again, never letting to GO.

Personally, I think the hurt has had enough power over me already.
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  #74   ^
Old Sun, Feb-12-06, 14:14
penelope's Avatar
penelope penelope is offline
Senior Member
Posts: 10,098
 
Plan: Controlled carbs
Stats: 218/195/150 Female 62"
BF:
Progress: 34%
Location: Alberta
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After giving birth (C-section) 3 days before, I am standing in the hospital hallway looking in the window at my son among the newborns; someone asked me when I was due.
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  #75   ^
Old Sun, Feb-12-06, 14:16
Lisa N's Avatar
Lisa N Lisa N is offline
Posts: 12,028
 
Plan: Bernstein Diabetes Soluti
Stats: 260/-/145 Female 5' 3"
BF:
Progress: 63%
Location: Michigan
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MrsSchaaff
To me it is incomprehensible. People like this will never understand the impact they have.


Unfortunately, Jess, I believe that many of them know exactly the impact that they have and do what they do on purpose, like that person from high school. What I honestly cannot comprehend is what drives people to be so purposefully hurtful. The only conclusion that I have reached after pondering this for some time is that for whatever reason, there are some people who are just hurtful, angry, mean bast***s who are best avoided whenever possible.

On the other hand, the following quote from a former first lady was very helpful in helping me move on from my own childhood hurts (and for those who have observed that it's the dads who do this, it was my mom in my case):

"Noone can make you feel inferior without your consent."---Eleanor Roosevelt

Reading that one day, a light bulb went on for me...an 'aha!' moment, if you will. That was the day I stopped giving that consent.

Quote:
If someone made an insulting comment to one of my kids, they'd better learn to duck, no matter if they're family or not.


Potatofree, I agree 100%. I'm a big girl and can take care of myself, but hurt one of my kids and you'll have to deal with 'momma grizzly'.
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