Thanks all of you for the support (and ideas) regarding the exercise. I finally had my first visit with my new psychologist and he seems to think that I have (shocker) panic disorder with agoraphobia. So - same old diagnosis, but at least this guy seems interested in helping me and not just pretending to listen. He said the first thing I have to work on - as the foundation for all of my fears - is my heart phobia. To do this, he said I have to exercise and get my heart rate up and desensitize myself to it. So...last night I danced for about an hour. I had a helluva good time...and if I got tired I just danced a LOT slower. I did great! I had fun! I hope I lost weight.

The doctor I saw to prescribe medicine is helping me to decrease my xanax intake - and she increased my Lexapro dose to 10mg. 7.5mg for one week, then up to 10mg for a week, and then I'll see her again to let her know how it's going. So far it's not great - I haven't been able to decrease the xanax yet because starting up the Lexapro has made me a little extra anxious. (Plus, I got my TOM today which ALWAYS makes me supremely extra anxious!)

So, anyway - I'm feeling a little hopeful on the anxiety front. I really, really can't wait to get through the increase in anxiety from the Lexapro dose increase, though Anyone with any ideas on how long that this lasts?

Thanks again for the yoga and pilates ideas. I have seven yoga tapes I've never even put in the VCR. Maybe I should, huh?

You guys are the best....(hugs)

Good for you! I'm so proud of you for dancing for an hour!! Hooray!

On a really wierd note - I woke up today and remembered that I had a strange dream where I was just dancing and dancing. No one else around, just me goin' to town, and loving it. I woke up and thought how wierd it was, because I haven't danced in about 10 years (too self-conscious). I think I must have been doing a little astral traveling last night, and was right there dancing with you. How fun! It's your turn to come visit me tonight (much cheaper than airfare!)

OOOH!!! Astral travel! I have ALWAYS wanted to be able to do that! That's so weird that you had a dream about dancing and having so much fun with it - that's the way it was. Man - was THAT a workout, too!

Oh, and I haven't danced in - about forever - either. Way to self conscious!! Someday, though

I'd second the pilates idea - i did pilates for several months, but then it started to clash with my working hours (I do 2nd shift). You don't ever get puffed out with a racing heart the way you would do with many other forms of exercise. And though I don't do pilates any more, I still apply the little I learnt in my job when lifting and such (pilates exercises protect the back).

Well it's a whole lot better, but that's partly because I moved away from the people I was scared to bump into (anyone from work and anyone who knew me by the work I did and might ask me how it was going). I still can't go back into that whole area. Which is a shame, as I never went in to pick up my stuff (including maybe $1000 dollars worth of books).



That reminds me of how I was at that age. I wasn't agoraphobic, but if I started going out with a guy I couldn't talk to him any more. With one guy, this was quite literal. He told me he hoped I'd get better but he didn't want to go out any more. As soon as I got over being dumped we were really good mates, and I could talk to him again. But at the time it was like my mouth was full of clay!



Oh, I won't come back, but that's cause I haven't left! I have a light box and that definitely helps so I think I'll check out the vitamin D too.

Thanks.

I just realized I never responded to your post on here!! I'm a ditz sometimes, I swear! I just finished reading your journal, too - wow, you've been through so much lately! I hope it hasn't contributed to your anxiety. I know it must be so difficult to deal with the emotions from work and then being sick, then having your tooth be in pain!!

Congratulations on being a bride-to-be soon, though! That's exciting!!

I just went to the dentist on Saturday and had a GRAND old time. (NOT!!!!) I hate the dentist - all I wanted him to do was fill a cavity, but noooo - he checked out my dental insurance and realized I can get all kinds of stuff done, so he's doing "periodontal work" (or something like that - gum work) before he fixes the actual problem. I've been there twice and I still have a giant hole in one of my teeth. Andthen the idiot tells me that "Yes, you're right - there IS adrenaline mixed in with the novacaine...I'm surprised you know that - most people don't!" Yeah. Yeah, I know that. I know it becaue I can feel it every single time!! And to make matters worse I have an extra nerve in the roof of my mouth that takes extra novacaine to numb! NOT fun! (Grrrr.) So, I go back in 2 weeks to get more gum work done, and then in another 2weeks to get the damn hole filled FINALLY. He surely is milking my insurance for all it's worth! And again - I HATE dentists. I feel trapped in the chair. I will give this guy credit in that he is a yacker - never stops talking about the silliest things - which makes my anxiety a lot less. he works pretty quickly, too - thank God.

Good thing I was totally numb after that appointment on Saturday or else - because of the bad day and the near-full-bown-panic at the dentist - I would have loved to have stopped at a pizza place and eaten a couple of slices!!! Yes...it's a very, very good thing I was totally numbed up.

Well, again - it's great to have you here.

I have NO clue what pilates is - but I'll definitely check it out. I can't sink any more money into anything right now since we're buying a house - but if anyone wants to trade some Yoga video tapes for Pilates tapes or DVDs - I'm open to that!! Trades are good.

Oh - we should do a clothing swap for when we grow out of our clothes...that's a good idea that I'm sure has already been done a lot on this website, but maybe with a smaller group it would work better? Of course, I haven't lost any clothing sizes yet - things are looser - but I'm not ready to trade them in yet...a size 20 is still a little too uncomfortable for me. *sigh*

Lisa, my love, you are a genius! Great idea about trading tapes and clothes! Unfortunately, I donated all my larger sizes when I moved a few months ago (didn't want to drag them with me, and was determined to not need them again!) but when I'm out of my 14's and into a 12 I'll be glad to pass them on.

p.s. My son is running through the house naked at the moment. His little biscuits are SO cute!!!!!!

Did anyone ever take Lexapro ... and if so, did you feel extra anxiety during the time you were increasing the dose?

Thanks!

This is either pre menopause or anxiety disorder for me, yet I decided not to take any more antidepressant pills....I've been off for three months now......

I'm actually thinking of going off of the Lexapro, too. I am as anxious on it as I was without it so what's the point. Actually - I'm MORE anxious now than before. I was off of AD for 3 years and felt a lot better - but still had my phobias. I will admit that my phobias have gotten worse since I started back on AD, though. Why do doctors push us into taking them when they don't work for us? I know they work for some people, but so far - not for me. (sigh)

In answer to your question; doctors get kickback checks when they prescribe these pills , just like when I used to sell mattresses, I got a check from the manufacturer,not just from my employer.. and so do the drs when they prescribe these pills.

I knew that, but I just can't believe they do it. It's so dirty and underhanded, and certainly doesn't leave me feeling like they have my best interests at heart.

I was reading about how LCing affects seratonin levels - and how the first three or four weeks of LCing can be difficult for people with anxiety disorder. I have found that to be true - but can't - for certain - pin it down on the LCing. It's been hard - (anxiety symptom-wise), but WHY?

Ever curious...

I think low seratonin levels produces the stress hormone that causes fat to build at a quicker rate...........don't quote me on this one, lol

Because in the short term carbs produce serotonin which is a mood enhancer. When you go induction, this prop is taken away.

You can enhance serotonin and relieve anxiety with vitamin D, magnesium, and calcium. Much better for you than antidepressants.

I believe you are right on this...not sure exactly if its the low seratonin that works in the over-production of cortisol (the stress hormone), but typically when someone is in a state of high anxiety, the body reacts by going into "fight or flight" mode, which in turn causes the production of cortisol. Excesssive production of cortisol over time, certainly can lead to weight gain (most notably around the tummy)...for more, read on...

Cortisol and Your Body

Cortisol is an important hormone in the body, secreted by the adrenal glands and involved in the following functions and more:

Proper glucose metabolism
Regulation of blood pressure
Insulin release for blood sugar maintanence
Immune function
Inflammatory response

Normally, it’s present in the body at higher levels in the morning, and at its lowest at night. Although stress isn’t the only reason that cortisol is secreted into the bloodstream, it has been termed “the stress hormone” because it’s also secreted in higher levels during the body’s ‘fight or flight’ response to stress, and is responsible for several stress-related changes in the body. Small increases of cortisol have some positive effects:


A quick burst of energy for survival reasons
Heightened memory functions
A burst of increased immunity
Lower sensitivity to pain
Helps maintain homeostasis in the body

While cortisol is an important and helpful part of the body’s response to stress, it’s important that the body’s relaxation response to be activated so the body’s functions can return to normal. Unfortunately, in our current high-stress culture, the body’s stress response is activated so often that functioning often doesn’t have a chance to return to normal, producing chronic stress.

Higher and more prolonged levels of cortisol in the bloodstream (like those associated with chronic stress) have been shown to have negative effects, such as:


Impaired cognitive performance
Suppressed thyroid function
Blood sugar imbalances such as hyperglycemia
Decreased bone density
Decrease in muscle tissue
Higher blood pressure
Lowered immunity and inflammatory responses in the body, as well as other health consequences

Increased abdominal fat, which is associated with a greater amount of health problems than fat deposited in other areas of the body. Some of the health problems associated with increased stomach fat are heart attacks, strokes, the development of , higher levels of “bad” cholesterol (LDL) and lower levels of “good” cholesterol (HDL), which can lead to other health problems!

To keep cortisol levels healthy and under control, the body’s relaxation response should be activated after the fight or flight response occurs. You can learn to relax your body with various stress management techniques, and you can make lifestyle changes in order to keep your body from reacting to stress in the first place. The following have been found by many to be very helpful in relaxing the body and mind, aiding the body in maintaining healthy cortisol levels:


Guided Imagery
Journaling
Self-Hypnosis
Exercise
Yoga
Listening to Music
Breathing Exercises
Meditation
Sex

Other Techniques

Cortisol secretion varies among individuals. People are biologically ‘wired’ to react differently to stress. One person may secrete higher levels of cortisol than another in the same situation. Studies have also shown that people who secrete higher levels of cortisol in response to stress also tend to eat more food, and food that is higher in carbohydrates than people who secrete less cortisol. If you’re more sensitive to stress, it’s especially important for you to learn stress management techniques and maintain a low-stress lifestyle.

Article can be found online at: http://stress.about.com/od/stresshe.../cortisol_p.htm