how does being fat affect you?

i feel angry and frustrated and very self-conscious?

what about u?

Self-hatred, worthlessness, guilt, inadequacy... The problem I have is still thinking I’m “fat and ugly” even when I’m thin. I suffer depression over my looks, or the way I feel. Hormones have always played a big role in my mood swings, but it feels like a constant batter of roller coaster emotions, and false body image delusions.

http://forum.lowcarber.org/forumdisplay.php?f=121

This thread should go here ^^^^^

thats exactly how i feel, people are always telling me i am beautiful and i dont believe them, i think they are lying...i hate myself sometimes, and its all because of food

Before I got to my current weight, I felt ugly, hopeless, unattractive no matter how beautiful my husband said I was, ashamed and all around depressed. Since I started LCing, I have thrown away my anti-depressants and feel better than I ever have. It has changed my life

Body image and Self image are two different things ~ You can improve your body image by losing weight and toning up, but it won't change your Self Image, that can only come from within yourself and has nothing to do with the outside.

We are so many things that have nothing to do with how big we are. We are:

Mothers, Fathers, Wives, Husbands, Children, Sisters, Brothers, Best Friends......

I've been on both sides. I am so called "obese" nowadays and I hate it. I get really depressed when I think about that my hubby has only a few punds more than me but he is a head taller. We are going on our holidays soon and as much as I am looking forward to it I also feel slightly depressed by the thought of me in a swim suit. Only a few years ago I was really slim after losing an awful lot of weight by virtually eating nothing which resulted in me getting gall bladder surgery. I must admit I was just as selfconcious those days as I am now I am "fat" again. This time round I will make it though and I will take my time. I put the scales away, they make things worse. I can feel I am losing weight on my clothes and I am only weighing myself once a month which makes me happy because it is always positive because I lost weight. I can't await the day I will fit in my skinny jeans again. I am trying to see things more positive and my supporting hubby gives me a lot of strengh. He loves me no matter what and that gives me all the time in the world to reach my goal weight once again.

I feel like the last kid that gets picked on a baseball team - not first choice, undesirable, slower, judged. And someone will eventually take pity on me.

I hate looking in the mirror. I refuse to get my picture taken any more. I feel ugly and less than...

I feel invisible - I used to get noticed! Women looked at my clothes and men looked at my figure. When I was thin people were nicer - salespeople approached me faster, men looked at me. People were just plain old nicer to me. Now I am heavy and I still feel like I am that thin beautiful woman inside but I know that I am fat - and not as pretty as I used to be. I still feel great about me though...I am a wonderful person and I love myself no matter how fat or thin I am. But I do feel invisible. Men still look at me but look away quickly so that I don't catch them looking.

I guess I have felt a little bit lost...a little bit not like myself. Sad, depressed and disappointed.

But I am on the way back to me. I just started induction officially today and can't wait for my first 2 weeks to be over so that I can see the results. I will stay on induction until I have lost 35 pounds and then move to the next phase.

I never want to feel this bad again.

It makes me different.

When you're so far out of the norm, it can give you clarity. I have a perspective I might never have been able to have had I never been fat. I think it made me kinder, more empathetic, stronger ... independent of spirit and mind. It made me look past the surface.

It also made me hotter - those layers really do insulate! I had more health problems. I was in more pain and had less mobility. I was more filled out into my skin, more noticable ... yet less visible to others.

And I'm still on the journey! I'm looking forward to the rest of the trip.

A typical overweight Native American, and just an overweight American.

I don't feel sexy. I'm embarrassed at the gym locker room. I wear really boring clothes and I'm not a boring person. It makes me feel kind of scared as well, because I don't want to be fat forever and I know it will only get harder as I have kids and get older.

AND I DO NOT want to be a fat bride and have everyone looking at my big butt in the the big white dress next to my very slim fiance and thinking - god, what a fatso - she could have made an effort for her wedding.

Being fat makes me feel like I'll never fit in.

Being fat makes me feel heavy, hot, slobbish.

Being fat makes me feel unprofessional and tired.

Being fat makes me feel judged.

Being fat makes me feel unattractive and unsexual.

Being fat makes me feel anxious.

Being fat makes me feel unworthy.

Being fat makes me feel worried and disappointed.

i think the worse thing for me is feeling... like i'm not "myself."

i'm very social, like to jump into things with both feet, like to grab people by both hands and drag them into new experiences that i know they will enjoy and enjoy it with them. i'm flamboyant, not shy. i'm even brash at times.

but this me, the me in my mind, changes when i am hit with a wave of self-recognition. whe i look in the mirror and realize that this confidence should not be coupled with someone who looks the way i do. when i put on that fabulous crushed velvet bright red skirt, a corset top in black (the outfit looks so beautiful on the hanger), a pair of fishnet tights and my boots, spend an hour on my hair with only a view of my head, pull the shaving mirror off the wall and do my makeup just so (but i can only see my face), walk out of the house feeling like a million bucks, and then catch a glimpse of myself in a store window while i'm out from the corner of my eye and have to do a double take when i realize that the heifer crammed into that red skirt that she should have known better than to wear in public is... ME.

i hate cooking a fabulous three course japanese meal for my friends to enjoy, for us to enjoy, to experience together, and being unable to really eat in front of them because every bite i take makes me more aware of how i look, what they must be thinking... so i pick at my food demurely and hog back all the leftovers when everyone has left...

i hate buying something at the thrift store thinking that it will be too big, getting it home, and not being able to even get it on, let alone buttoned.

its like my internal image of myself, and the me that i see in the mirror that is edging on 200lbs, are completely different people. when i make love to my husband, in the dark, i feel like a sex kitten, beautiful, desirable. the next day, when the mushy romantic feelings are still glazing the world pink, and i wake up and stretch languidly, and accidentally catch a glance of myself in the mirror, its like the image shatters and i'm disgusted that i was ever undressed in front of him at all.

i know i look like a mommy now. and i'm okay with never being a lingerie model. but if i could get my real body to be at least not so jarringly different from the internal me that feels she has the right to self-confidence, i think i could be a lot less manic-depressive.