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  #1   ^
Old Mon, Sep-16-19, 05:55
DancinGurl's Avatar
DancinGurl DancinGurl is offline
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Plan: Atkins/KETO/IF
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Default Fat Shaming (James Corden's Response to Bill Maher)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ax1U04c4gaw

James Corden managed to give a funny, measured and factual response to Bill Maher's call for the return of fat-shaming (as if it ever went away.) Bullying does not help. Not from others, not from ourselves (IMHO.) I imagine many of us on this forum have been on the receiving end of bullying about our weight to some extent. Let's refrain from beating ourselves up for past mistakes, and instead let's learn from those mistakes, and keep working on finding what works best for us moving forward, for the sake of our health and sanity. And let's stand up for others when they are bullied for whatever reason.
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  #2   ^
Old Mon, Sep-16-19, 06:47
Ms Arielle's Avatar
Ms Arielle Ms Arielle is offline
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Plan: atkins, carnivore 2023
Stats: 200/211/163 Female 5'8"
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Here. Here.

When I read DANDR, I was freed of the shame , a shame that drove more eating, not less.

Obesity is a metabolic, hormonal imbalance that requires a vlc diet to manage.
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  #3   ^
Old Mon, Sep-16-19, 07:18
jschwab jschwab is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ms Arielle
Here. Here.

When I read DANDR, I was freed of the shame , a shame that drove more eating, not less.

Obesity is a metabolic, hormonal imbalance that requires a vlc diet to manage.


I would add that we don't even have a lot of control over environmental influences/heredity. If there are hormone disruptors in the water we drink, etc., where can people who are sensitive to that really go with it? Diet only goes so far these days. I've been fat since I was a little kid. Even when I weighed about 150 in HS, I still looked very fat to people and was in plus sizes. The truth is, back then, I was always bullied about my weight because the bullying is not about the weight, it's about the bullying. Women who are size 2 get bullied about their weight.
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  #4   ^
Old Mon, Sep-16-19, 09:29
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Ms Arielle Ms Arielle is offline
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Plan: atkins, carnivore 2023
Stats: 200/211/163 Female 5'8"
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Bullying is bad bad bad. Love and support is far more productive.

I was a heavy kid... rock solid big bones, big muscles and very tall.....still made to feel inadequate. I was super strong. My sister was same height but fine bones, when she became very ill and lost a lot of weight she was called "Annie" because she looked anorexic. She regained her weight and started running again, which she has continued thru her adult life, though she carries middle age pounds along for the run well into her 50's.

Seems we are a society of critics.
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  #5   ^
Old Mon, Sep-16-19, 09:55
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JLx JLx is offline
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Plan: High protein, lower fat
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Default

I saw that clip of Corden's too and thought he did a good job of answering Maher. The research shows, and we all know it - fat shaming doesn't help, it only compounds the problem. Inevitably though someone will come along and unhelpfully say, "Well, it was only when I woke up to how many pounds I had packed on - when I faced what a fat slob I had become - that I lose the weight by just putting down the fork."

It sounded like Corden got a warm reception by his audience. But then Maher did too, of course.
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  #6   ^
Old Mon, Sep-16-19, 10:17
jschwab jschwab is offline
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Plan: Atkins72/Paleo/NoGrain/IF
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ms Arielle
Bullying is bad bad bad. Love and support is far more productive.

I was a heavy kid... rock solid big bones, big muscles and very tall.....still made to feel inadequate. I was super strong. My sister was same height but fine bones, when she became very ill and lost a lot of weight she was called "Annie" because she looked anorexic. She regained her weight and started running again, which she has continued thru her adult life, though she carries middle age pounds along for the run well into her 50's.

Seems we are a society of critics.


I think this is one of the aspects that really irritates me. I teach a sport which means I encounter many, many bodies and I see what fatness/thinness really mean for physical ability. It means squat. One of my best students in terms of sheer athletic ability weighed probably about 300 pounds. I've had students who run out of breath picking up a pencil who are thin and "fit-looking". It matters in different ways for different activities but thin people never get dinged for being out of shape and weak. They used to and that was also not fair but, in both scenarios, it's all based on stereotype and myth. Some of the strongest people are the skinniest and vice versa.
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  #7   ^
Old Mon, Sep-16-19, 13:19
Ms Arielle's Avatar
Ms Arielle Ms Arielle is offline
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Plan: atkins, carnivore 2023
Stats: 200/211/163 Female 5'8"
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Default

Yup...exactly my experience too.

We looked at a private high school that required all students to participate in sports from 2-5pm M-F. Seems like a good model to me.

My skinny kid who has given up on sports has started walking everyday right after school, before clubs start. Hes getting his lazy friends to walk too.

My other boy made soccer team and plays M-F.

When they get home, Both are ready for dinner and homework. A well rounded day.

I have noticed the percent of over weight kids is very low. Im wondering why. Is there a real connection between grades/success and obesity...?

Shaming kids is not helpful.... and their future is a bit bleaker. How aweful.
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  #8   ^
Old Mon, Sep-16-19, 14:28
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s93uv3h s93uv3h is offline
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bill who? _____
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  #9   ^
Old Mon, Sep-16-19, 15:28
HappyLC HappyLC is offline
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Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by jschwab
...bullying is not about the weight, it's about the bullying. Women who are size 2 get bullied about their weight.


Thank you for this! My daughter was extremely skinny in middle school and was bullied mercilessly.
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  #10   ^
Old Mon, Sep-16-19, 17:50
jschwab jschwab is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by HappyLC
Thank you for this! My daughter was extremely skinny in middle school and was bullied mercilessly.


That's awful!
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  #11   ^
Old Mon, Sep-16-19, 23:34
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teaser teaser is offline
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Plan: mostly milkfat
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JLx
I saw that clip of Corden's too and thought he did a good job of answering Maher. The research shows, and we all know it - fat shaming doesn't help, it only compounds the problem. Inevitably though someone will come along and unhelpfully say, "Well, it was only when I woke up to how many pounds I had packed on - when I faced what a fat slob I had become - that I lose the weight by just putting down the fork."

It sounded like Corden got a warm reception by his audience. But then Maher did too, of course.


Another case of correlation not equalling causation. In a fat-shaming environment, just about everybody who goes on a diet/starts exercising, does anything to try to decrease their body weight, is likely to have some shame involved in their decision/motivation to do so. If the change is successful, it doesn't mean that that was the best way to get motivated, it's just an accident of history.

At any rate, I believe what actually is true matters, beyond what the effect of a belief is. Believing something is shameful might motivate somebody, but whether it is actually shameful matters in and of itself.

Also I guess we could ask, if shame is the motivator--what is to motivate the person if the diet is successful? More shame? Does the person ever get to just be happy?

One of the commentors said something about a small number of people having special metabolic issues, disease etc. as sort of an alibi for their bodyweight. This shows up a lot, in studies even where special causes of obesity are looked at, there's this "most obesity is caused by eating too much and exercising too little," mantra that's repeated. People look for genes that attach to obesity--if special genetic markers aren't found in most people, then default--they eat too much exercise too little, CICO. Sort of a fallacy here, in that if most people are susceptible to overweight and obesity--and judging by the latest data, where ten states have just broached the 35 percent obesity mark, this seems to be the case--well, it wouldn't be surprising that special genetics aren't required--there aren't a special few who are predisposed to obesity, almost all of us are. There are special causes of obesity, that doesn't mean the usual cause is shameful.

I do suspect it comes down largely to diet, but that's a matter of us trying to eat less of a diet, in an environment, and with given food choices, where it's very hard to eat less. Reducing our appetite is very different from trying to eat less than our appetite. Appetite is not a moral behaviour, it's a biological drive. You can't shame yourself out of having a biological drive.
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  #12   ^
Old Mon, Sep-23-19, 10:03
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Lbangle Lbangle is offline
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Plan: Atkins/Duke diet
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Default

I watched the episode with Bill Maher - I always watch his show. This is not the first time he has addressed the issue, or called people out (politicians, actors, public figures) for being obese. Since he is a comedian, this is usually in an insult disguised in a joke. I always cringe when he does that.

I actually think that he is addressing it as a health issue and is using his platform to try to bring it to public attention, but that does not mean it is right. I appreciate James Cordon's response.

Its so typical of someone who has never had a weight problem to think those that do are just weak and eat what they want. That is ignoring all kinds of medical issues and medication issues that cause weight gain. For example, doctors changed my husbands diabetes medicine because two were causing kidney damage, and he immediately began gaining weight while eating the same way. He has been fighting it ever since and is struggling to lose the 30 pounds he gained.

I will continue to watch Bill Maher because I love his show, but I hope he learns a little something from the comments. Of course, he loves controversy and being politically incorrect so who knows?

One thing I do know is that fat shaming or bullying is not an incentive to lose weight. In fact, it usually has the opposite effect. Until people make that decision for themselves, all the fat shaming in the world won't help. Its easy not to see yourself as others see you. To me, I was the same person I always was.....I was shocked when I would see a picture of myself, but what motivated me finally was terrible foot and knee pain, and a kind foot surgeon who gently told me that my pain would be much less and damage to my feet and knees much less if I could manage to lose some weight. He explained about the pounds of pressure on each foot and knee when I walked at this weight. It was something like twice your weight on each step. I weighed 267 at that time so that was huge. When I left his office I started my diet.
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  #13   ^
Old Sun, Dec-29-19, 00:00
e tolle jr e tolle jr is offline
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Plan: lchf
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I just don't get into all that crybaby stuff. what about takin responsibility for myself ?...a victim has no power and i'm not a victim. I put every bite of that food in my mouth and didn't exercise until I became obese.
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  #14   ^
Old Sun, Dec-29-19, 00:09
jschwab jschwab is offline
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Plan: Atkins72/Paleo/NoGrain/IF
Stats: 285/220/200 Female 5 feet 5.5 inches
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lbangle
I was shocked when I would see a picture of myself, but what motivated me finally was terrible foot and knee pain, and a kind foot surgeon who gently told me that my pain would be much less and damage to my feet and knees much less if I could manage to lose some weight. He explained about the pounds of pressure on each foot and knee when I walked at this weight. It was something like twice your weight on each step. I weighed 267 at that time so that was huge. When I left his office I started my diet.


How do you know it has anything to do with it, though? I injured my foot about 18 months ago when I weighed about what you did (267). Since then, I've lost about 50 pounds and the foot is worse now than it was. I have never felt like weight made as much much difference when rest, rehab and getting stronger for any aches and pains I've had has. I feel like this is one of those myths of modern medicine that is rarely examined.
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  #15   ^
Old Sun, Dec-29-19, 10:28
Bonnie OFS Bonnie OFS is offline
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Plan: Dr. Bernstein
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Default

And then there's the singer who recently said that fat shaming helped him lose weight. Wouldn't work for me. At my fattest, if anyone said something negative, I'd end up later crying over my high-carb meal or dessert binge, not understanding why it drew me so much.

Thank God I found a good book (Dr. B's Diabetes Solution), Reversing Diabetes, and this forum. I've learned SO much. And I'm still learning.
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