Just about a month ago, I ran across the concept of the Highly Sensitive Person.

And discovered that I'm in the 20% of the population that is one!

Here's the self-test I took, a 27 item checklist, and got 21.



Since this concept has only been developed and recognized as such since 1996, it is highly probable that we were denigrated for having this trait. In fact, most of the book Dr. Aron wrote on the subject is about reassuring such folks that they have been unfairly treated when they express this trait!



This is an innate trait; we are born this way. And dealing with the 80% of the population who are not highly sensitive? That can be very upsetting!

I've just begun exploring the implications, but this explains much of how the stress during my adolescence tormented me so much, why I binged as a coping mechanism, and why I "take things so hard."

I'm just built that way

But it also comes with gifts! Being a Noticer also means picking up subtle cues others miss, figuring out the behaviors of people and pets, and embracing the good, and bad, in life more deeply.

I wouldn't trade this gift for anything.

I'm also a HSP - known this for a while. This was explained to me as being a result of growing up in an abusive situation.

Being a noticer can be a good thing - being able to read people's emotions, knowing more easily when someone is lying or uncomfortable about something (how I discovered my ex husband was cheating ). The main problem I've found with it is when combined with low self esteem - I sense someone is not quite their normal self, but because of low self esteem assume it must be something I've done when invariably it isn't. I find being around people stressful for this reason. Luckily my husband doesn't like being around groups of people for exactly the opposite reason - he has Asperger's. We make an odd couple!

Not sure where the extra sensitive sense of smell comes from, but that IS really annoying - I can smell things other people can't, and they constantly tell me I'm imagining it, until the smell gets stronger.

Interesting topic.

I'm no expert on Asperger's, but one of the more recent theories of the autism spectrum is that those on it are MORE sensitive to normal stimuli and therefore have to learn ways to tune things out to survive.

Yes, though not sensitive to people, he's highly sensitive to noise, stress and excess stimulation - just blind to social communication apart from basic verbal.

I don't know how my own husband would react if he were not suffering from an auto-immune disorder; this messes up his "filter" where he handles input, and sometimes he just has to sit in front of the computer with his earphones on and shut out the world.

But I understand because of my own sensitivity. Sometimes I get groceries on Friday night and close the door and don't open it until Monday morning. I've just got to "get away" from all these demands on my time or I won't get my own creative work done.

I'd forgotten I actually have this book. I remember reading it when my son was a toddler. (He's now 16) It helped me understand a lot about me and him at the time.
My girls loved trips to the store or mall and were great while out. My son was a screaming nightmare after 15 minutes. After reading this, I no longer subjected him to shopping trips that were obviously over stimulating him. And I incorporated a lot of sensory play when he was "acting out".

I think I'll reread the book since I don't remember much of what was in it.

I seem to manage a lot of "input" but then need some serious downtime afterwards to decompress. I was always a solitary bookworm and if my mother knew this was "normal for me" I think both of us would have had an easier time while I was growing up!

And that's why I find this concept so revelatory. Not for me; I was always happy with my innate mental structure. But there's something about telling other people, "I'm not weird, I'm 20% of the population" that helps THEM accept such a difference.

I brought it up because it obviously has a great impact on our stress handling our whole lives. And lotsa stress certainly had an impact on my health and weight.

Yeah I rate pretty up there on the highly sensitve scale.

I'm not sure if I'm a HSP or not, because in some ways I don't fit.

However, there are lot of ways I do.
One thing that sticks out in my mind is that all my life when it came to moments in comedy movies where a character was in an extremely embarrassing situaton, I could not watch because I'd feel it! I'd seriously plug my ears and close my eyes.

Wow, I am really fascinated by this. I'll definitely add this to the "to read" list.

When I really struggled with depression (I don't consider it a struggle anymore, as long as I keep up with my good lifestyle habits) probably my most irritating symptom was an intolerance to crowds and people-noise. Getting the bus to and from school just about drove me to tears. BEING at school just about drove me to tears. To this day, I have to have music in my ears or I'm not a happy camper. I can tolerate noisy bus rides better now, but of course, now there are always people yelling on their cell phones (whole 'nother thread there.)

S-piper, that's me, too, only it's not limited to embarrassment. It's like I can't suspend my imagination of it happening to me. Same with violent movies and even the news. I avoid the news because things haunt me, if that makes sense.

I've always said that I felt like an emotional conduit. If there's an emotionally-charged situation going on around me, it affects me. For example, if one of my bosses are giving a coworker hell, it makes me unbelievably uncomfortable; even though the bosses are even-tempered people. It's not like Hell's Kitchen!

Anyway, I'll be interested in reading more about this concept.

Yes, interesting subject. I definitely relate. I didn't count how many I got, but it was above 14 - I think above 20.

I've know for quite a while that I'm very sensitive, I've thought if it as hyper-reactive, hyper-vigilant. I've found I need a certain amount of quiet time, especially as I work in job that is over- stimulating. I have to be "on" for much of the day.

I like your perspective, WereBear, where you comment on the benefits of being a noticer. I agree, i think it actually helps me with my job, too.

hhmmmm, well am I autistic?? I scored 5! and found most of the questions pointless!?

Jo xxx

Pointless how?

They just seemed a bit......irrelevant to life and day to day living - too deep???? Maybe what I'm saying is yes, ok, maybe everyone feels like that... So what?? its trivial and not something to be concerned about!

I dont know, but for me, lifes about putting silly worries like that to one side, theres bigger stuff to worry about. We should all be so grateful that we have our health, we live in safe countries, we have mod cons and have the freedom to enjoy what we have, not find new little things to fret over


I'm not putting anyone down, I'm just saying we're lucky and should celebrate that and not worry about trivia.




Jo xxx

I scored an "18". Can't say I consider myself 'highly sensitive' or have ever had anyone consider me as such. I can say many of the questions which did apply have been acquired in the past decade (more or less) only.