The Naughty Low Carber
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I am a low-carber, a seasoned one, too,
I try to be helpful and welcome those new,
Yet I have some secrets I don't like to tell,
I shell out advice but don't follow mine well.
Coffee, I chug two or three cups a day,
And one could not take my Diet Pepsi away,
I cheat regularly with coolers and beer,
Despite all the warnings of those I spout here!
I hate exercise and force myself away
From this damned machine, or I'd be here all day,
I often skip veggies since they're not my fave,
How poor Dr Atkins must turn in his grave.
Yet I suppose that since human I am,
I do not always have to hit a grand slam,
And because my health is outta sight,
I sure as hell must be doing *something* right!
This is fun. I don't want to clean my bathroom.