Feeling aggravated and losing interest in helping.... : Pre-Maintenance & Maintenance Forum : Active Low-Carber Forums

#16 ^

Fri, Nov-18-11, 18:46

HappyLC

Senior Member

Posts: 1,876

Plan: Generic low carb
Stats: 212/167/135 Female 66.75

BF:
Progress: 58%

Location: Long Island, NY

Quote:

Originally Posted by freckles

Also, the issue had to do with what was SAID/rudeness, so it is not even a matter of whether I could relate or not. It doesn't matter whether you have 5 or 500 lbs to lose, there is no need to be rude to responders when you have asked a question just because you don't like the response.

Okay...didn't see the rude response...I was thinking it was a completely different thread.

(Guess I shouldn't go sticking my nose in things....

)

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#17 ^

Fri, Nov-18-11, 20:37

cnmLisa

Every day is day one

Posts: 7,776

Plan: AtkinsMaintenance/IF
Stats: 185/145/155 Female 5'5

BF:
Progress: 133%

Location: Oregon Coast

So Freckes....I've been thinking about you today...in a good way....

A year ago I wouldn't have even believed half the well-thought out responses that you have posted in the the last 6 months--vegetables, climbing the climb ladder, being patient, sticking to plan, etc. YOU have made the paradigm shift (I'm like a proud mama because YOU get it now). You are now in the place that many maintainers are in regarding advice, learning from mistakes, denial, etc. YOU have arrived! We (maintainers, so far, not to get cocky) as maintainers can only give the message... what people decide to do with it...well...you know....opinions are like noses...

I go thru periods where I respond or just scroll on by---my favorite ending to "those" kind of threads...."I'm just sayn'" and when they slink aback months later, you don't need to say "I told you so" it's already a given. It doesn't make us superior, it just makes us one of "those" people who this isn't our first rodeo and we've (hopefully) learned from our mistakes.

And rudeness?! Well, people are just jerks

#18 ^

Mon, Nov-21-11, 11:37

Enomarb

MAINTAINING ON CALP

Posts: 4,838

Plan: CALP/CAHHP
Stats: 180/125/150 Female 65 in

BF:
Progress: 183%

Location: usa

hi-
I get frustrated too sometimes- and I try to use the "scroll on by " strategy.

For me, posting and trying to help is giving back to this site and paying it forward to those who helped me.

I also believe that checking in and posting helps me stay OP.

I get upset when people flame others, don't seem to want to listen, or if what they are doing is dangerous or bad or scary. Sigh. I have enough trouble trying to take care of me, so I try to let it go.

Glad you posted this-- glad WE are all here.

Have a wonderful Thanksgiving. I am thankful for YOU.
E

#19 ^

Mon, Nov-21-11, 13:11

WereBear

Senior Member

Posts: 14,675

Plan: EpiPaleo/Primal/LowOx
Stats: 220/130/150 Female 67

BF:
Progress: 129%

Location: USA

I think a lot of time it's sad, too.

We know they're not going to get anywhere with that attitude, but trying too hard to tell them that will be met with hostility.

But hey! Just another opportunity to be diplomatic.

#20 ^

Mon, Nov-21-11, 13:35

krystalr

Induction ≠ Atkins

Posts: 5,886

Plan: Atkins
Stats: 270/164/180 Female 69 inches

BF:28%
Progress: 118%

Location: Frisco, TX

When I get overwhelmed, I just stay off the main boards. My patience is very thin right now with work, and I know some of the garbage on the main boards would just set me over the edge in a hurry.

If it sounds like someone that will listen, or someone very new, I'll post. If they've been around a while, then I usually just save it. I didn't see the thread in question, but I'd be willing to place a sizeable bet on who I think started it

#21 ^

Mon, Nov-21-11, 15:38

freckles

Senior Member

Posts: 8,730

Plan: Atkins Maintenance
Stats: 213/141/150 Female 5'4 1/2"

BF:
Progress: 114%

Location: Dallas, TX

Thanks Lisa and Eno!!

I am finally feeling like I've arrived. I just have to remember that I've been one of "those" people too before - only wanting to listen to what I want to hear. That's why this time around I was determined to follow maintainers and the maintenance forum and really listen to and follow advice from people who have been successful keeping it off. It's made a huge difference in my attitude and mindset about maintenance and I think that my success will be in great part due to that.

#22 ^

Mon, Nov-21-11, 17:19

Judynyc

Attitude is a Choice

Posts: 30,111

Plan: No sugar, flour, wheat
Stats: 228.4/209.0/170 Female 5'6"

BF:stl/too/mch
Progress: 33%

Location: NYC

Quote:

Originally Posted by freckles

I am finally feeling like I've arrived. I just have to remember that I've been one of "those" people too before - only wanting to listen to what I want to hear. That's why this time around I was determined to follow maintainers and the maintenance forum and really listen to and follow advice from people who have been successful keeping it off. It's made a huge difference in my attitude and mindset about maintenance and I think that my success will be in great part due to that.

Yes, you have arrived Terri!!

OK, now I just have to say this and please don't hate me for it.

when you said stuff like "don't tell me not to eat dairy" "I can't hear you, lalalalala" now you know how it felt to be on the other end of hearing that.

There were some days when I wanted to say to you: "Have some chicken with your cheese?" and didn't.

#23 ^

Mon, Nov-21-11, 21:26

cnmLisa

Every day is day one

Posts: 7,776

Plan: AtkinsMaintenance/IF
Stats: 185/145/155 Female 5'5

BF:
Progress: 133%

Location: Oregon Coast

Quote:

Originally Posted by Judynyc

Yes, you have arrived Terri!!

OK, now I just have to say this and please don't hate me for it.

when you said stuff like "don't tell me not to eat dairy" "I can't hear you, lalalalala" now you know how it felt to be on the other end of hearing that.

There were some days when I wanted to say to you: "Have some chicken with your cheese?" and didn't.

Ok--we get to pick on Frecks for 30 seconds. That just made me bust out laughing

Yes Frecks...you have come a long waaaaayyyy baby!

(and that's part of why you're in the maintain lane now--you go girl. I'm like a proud mama

)

#24 ^

Tue, Nov-22-11, 09:45

Judynyc

Attitude is a Choice

Posts: 30,111

Plan: No sugar, flour, wheat
Stats: 228.4/209.0/170 Female 5'6"

BF:stl/too/mch
Progress: 33%

Location: NYC

Quote:

Originally Posted by cnmLisa

Ok--we get to pick on Frecks for 30 seconds. That just made me bust out laughing

Yes Frecks...you have come a long waaaaayyyy baby!

(and that's part of why you're in the maintain lane now--you go girl. I'm like a proud mama

)

Yes, she has come a very long way...and has seen the light!

Now she is in computer hell and I feel for her. Poor Freckles!

#25 ^

Tue, Nov-22-11, 10:20

cnmLisa

Every day is day one

Posts: 7,776

Plan: AtkinsMaintenance/IF
Stats: 185/145/155 Female 5'5

BF:
Progress: 133%

Location: Oregon Coast

Quote:

Originally Posted by Judynyc

Yes, she has come a very long way...and has seen the light!

Now she is in computer hell and I feel for her. Poor Freckles!

Nothing worse than the blue scren of death, or there is no connection to the hive activity (EEEKKKKK!!! What thehel could that be?) . Freckles, my heart is with you during these trying times.

#26 ^

Tue, Nov-22-11, 12:54

freckles

Senior Member

Posts: 8,730

Plan: Atkins Maintenance
Stats: 213/141/150 Female 5'4 1/2"

BF:
Progress: 114%

Location: Dallas, TX

I def used a lot of cheese...always had....wish I still could.

Yes...I have access to a computer. But it's an old dinosaur that runs super slow. Internet provider probs too. When it rains it pours, of course. Could be worse, so it's all good.

#27 ^

Mon, Dec-19-11, 19:51

pengu1

Senior Member

Posts: 826

Plan: Maintenance since 6/08
Stats: 250/189/195 Male 70 inches

BF:Not so much.
Progress: 111%

Location: Sacramento, NorCal.

I don't scroll on by. I just don't get to this forum very much anymore. Not sure how I'd react if someone started flaming me for saying what needs to be said, but I think "Smug" would be a good way to describe it.

#28 ^

Mon, Jan-02-12, 16:10

NortonMan

Senior Member

Posts: 227

Plan: Maintenance
Stats: 208/170.2/170 Male 70 inches

BF:
Progress: 99%

Location: Louisiana

Take a break. Come back in a few months. They won't starve.

#29 ^

Sun, Feb-05-12, 22:36

Jonahsafta Jonahsafta is offline

Senior Member

Posts: 1,304

Plan: Atkins
Stats: 248/149.2/148 Female 69 inches

BF:
Progress: 99%

Location: Las Vegas

Quote:

Originally Posted by freckles

I've received a LOT of help from this forum. Honestly, the only reason I'm at goal for the third time and STILL there is due to the wonderful support and advice from long term maintainers.

But I have a whine/rant.

It makes me ANGRY when someone asks a question or asks for advice and then they get all po-ed because they don't like the answers and get all defensive....It makes me doubly angry when people who aren't even close to goal and never have been reinforce the OP.

But I get into FIGHTING mode when these people actually use passive/aggressive words to <put down> the long term maintainers. REALLY??? You've never seen goal, but you're going to be rude to those who have?????

I want SO badly to post rude, but truthful things....but I just can't. Guess I'm too nice. And in the long run they will see the true results.

Maybe I need to stay away from the forums....but maybe I need to be more vocal??? I want to help people that are serious about losing weight and being healthy. Guess I'm just becoming disenchanted about giving advice.

People just want to hear what they want to hear....but it's only going to keep them fat! Give me a reason to keep giving advice and doing my best to encourage people. Please.

I so relate...I have to occasionally step away from the keyboard! When you are on the message boards for any length of time..you see the pattern...again and again...the same "stinkin' thinkin'" the same whining...
keep telling the truth....it does count , especially for those who REALLY want to change their life..