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  #121   ^
Old Tue, Feb-18-03, 10:08
SummerYet's Avatar
SummerYet SummerYet is offline
Reinventing Myself
Posts: 11,768
 
Plan: Doctor's Plan
Stats: */*/* Female 5 ft 3 in
BF:
Progress: 77%
Location: Scotch Plains, NJ
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Wow...has this thread been a roller coaster!

I started reading this today and I was in tears because a lot of it hit home and some experiences just made me sad about society.

Then I started getting a knot in my stomach because af the "debating" going on...I didnt think that was the point of the thread.

Then everything leveled off again and ended on a better note...I realize this is an "old" thread...but the stories ring true no matter when you read them...

Thank you,
~Michelle
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  #122   ^
Old Sat, May-24-03, 19:29
spongebutt's Avatar
spongebutt spongebutt is offline
Senior Member
Posts: 223
 
Plan: South Beach
Stats: 189/187/124 Female 60.75 inches
BF:
Progress: 3%
Location: Washington
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I just wanted to add my two cents:

I work as a nurses' assistant/caregiver for disabled people.

An LPN (who is overweight), another caregiver (who's normal), and I were at the park in Puget Sound pushing three of them in their wheelchairs.

Now keep in mind that I'm a size FOUR. I heard these women (not my co-workers) talking about me!

I had jeans that had a repair in the behind (I bought them second-hand) because I don't wear good clothes to work (I get all sorts of bodily fluids on me and there's no sense in ruining good clothes). They were discussing how natty my jeans looked and how my big butt probably ripped them open.

I figured these two females were teenagers, but when I turned around to let them know I had heard them, I was surprised to learn that these women were in their early forties !
They just giggled when I looked at them (I kept my mouth shut), seemed a tad embarrassed, and then proceeded to verbally destroy a co-worker of theirs.
And neither of these women were model-types, either.

It's amazing how intolerant some people are. Would they make fun of me if they knew how much weight I've lost??
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  #123   ^
Old Mon, May-26-03, 11:52
Homegirl's Avatar
Homegirl Homegirl is offline
Senior Member
Posts: 1,322
 
Plan: Modified Atkins
Stats: 147/128/118 Female 5'3''
BF:?/18/17
Progress: 66%
Location: Victoria, BC, Canada
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I am always surprised when this old thread pops up again and again (it's on my subscribed list) but I agree that all the stories are still relevant.

Take care everyone!
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  #124   ^
Old Mon, Nov-07-05, 21:16
Andy Davies Andy Davies is offline
Senior Member
Posts: 1,212
 
Plan: My own (based on a compil
Stats: 333/260/224 Male 73 ins
BF:
Progress: 67%
Location: Hampshire, England
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It's more than 2 years now since I looked in here, but I'm glad to see recent messages show that both new and returning members still find the messages relevant and helpful. I was sorry, but at the same time still interested, to learn about Spongebutt's experiences...yet another facet of the way people deal with anything but an anorexic body shape. I wonder whether such rude people actually realise they are overweight themselves and disregard it, or whether they actually think of themselves as thinner than they are. Anyhow, I for one am very impressed with your statistics Spongebutt, and impressed too by your self control in a clearly trying and threatening situation.
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  #125   ^
Old Tue, Nov-08-05, 03:12
dearmommy's Avatar
dearmommy dearmommy is offline
Senior Member
Posts: 1,356
 
Plan: zeroish carbs
Stats: 388/300/150 Female 66inches
BF:unfortunately
Progress: 37%
Location: Vancouver Is BC Canada
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Pretty much everything said here hit home for me. I often fantasized what kind of retort I would reply with to unkind words if only I was more spontaneous. I realized soon enough though that the same people I would have replied to with a witty quip would more than likely be unable to understand and feel obligated to again make uncalled for remarks to cover up their feelings of inadequacy.
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  #126   ^
Old Tue, Nov-08-05, 16:23
KaiNiki's Avatar
KaiNiki KaiNiki is offline
Senior Member
Posts: 475
 
Plan: A lifestyle change
Stats: 270/248/186 Female 65 inches
BF:
Progress: 26%
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This thread was great,
It made me think about a conversation I had with my mother. We were talking about the possibility of my 10 year highschool reunion and I told her that I wanted to be successful when I went back. She asked what successful was and I was so warped I thought it meant thin. I have gotten a degree with two majors, been accepted to grad and law school, but none of it mattered if I was still fat. Thank God I don't feel that way anymore, my reunion is next year Oct. and if I go, I will go back with my head held high no matter what my weight.
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  #127   ^
Old Tue, Nov-08-05, 19:02
TarHeel's Avatar
TarHeel TarHeel is offline
Give chance a chance
Posts: 16,944
 
Plan: General LC maintenance
Stats: 152.6/115.6/115 Female 60 inches
BF:28%
Progress: 98%
Location: North Carolina
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I've been a member of the forum for close to three years. Never have I read a thread that affected me as this one has. Just amazing.....sociologically, stylistically, and historically, etc.

I'm envious of members who were around in 2001. They expressed themselves so well. But I have to wonder where they all are today? I do hope they have left because they met their goals before changing their stats. Thanks for resurrecting this, Andy.

You may think that at my weight, I don't need to be reading this thread. Think again. My nickname in high school was "Stumpy." It hurt.

Kay
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  #128   ^
Old Wed, Nov-09-05, 13:44
Homegirl's Avatar
Homegirl Homegirl is offline
Senior Member
Posts: 1,322
 
Plan: Modified Atkins
Stats: 147/128/118 Female 5'3''
BF:?/18/17
Progress: 66%
Location: Victoria, BC, Canada
Default

Well, I am still here! Not around every day as I used to be but I still pop in every now and then to update my journal and check in on a few people who were around when I was in the thick of getting control of my weight and my health.

Happy to say I am in more of a maintainance mode. I am still applying a lot of what I learned in my seach for a healthier body and a more appropriate scale weight (for me).

Is my body shape perfect? No. Is my body fat evenly and pleasingly distributed? No. Do I look like I did when I was 20? No. Am I healthy? Yes! Am I active? Yes! Am I grateful that I have a strong, healthy body? Yes! Am I comfortable with myself? Yes! Do I feel good about myself and my accomplishments (in all areas of life) Yes! Am I happy? Yes! Yes! Yes!

Cheers every body!
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  #129   ^
Old Wed, Nov-09-05, 16:31
Mousesmom's Avatar
Mousesmom Mousesmom is offline
Senior Member
Posts: 3,633
 
Plan: Atkins
Stats: 156/146.8/139 Female 69 inches
BF:
Progress: 54%
Location: Victoria, BC
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TarHeel
My nickname in high school was "Stumpy." It hurt.
Kay


Cruel nicknames are a subject that really resonated with me.

I have tons of stories of the abuse from family, children from school and their parents, the general public and people who I used to think of as friends. It was enough to put me into therapy. From my classmates at school throwing things at me (rocks, spit balls), calling me names and destroying everything I brought to school, even cutting off one of my ponytails and then there was the day I was pushed in front of a moving bus by older classmates...... to rude cat calls on the street from men who didn't even know me... to my family's constant reminders what a disappointment I was (and still am to a certain degree).... the men who though early puberty was cute and sexy.....and all the people who could have helped me but didn't - but I digress (as usual!)

When I was in junior high school, there was an English comedy on TV called "On the Buses" (some of you might remember it). One of the main characters was an overweight, dowdy, shy, eternally-single woman called "Olive". That became my nickname when I was 13 (size 16 and ~ 200#) in grade 8. I was voted most likely to commit suicide by my class mates that year. The school I went to was all jocks and brains - I was the smart-but-fat girl the teachers loved and the kids despised.

I left that school the following year and didn't see anyone from there for about 6 years. I was in a local shop where I found one of my worst tormenters. He addressed me as "Olive". I was 19 (size 12 and ~ 175#)! My then-DH wasn't impressed and offered to teach this moron a lesson. I did it instead: I got him fired. I saw this jerk a few years ago (I'm now 38) and guess what he called me?

I write all of this to illustrate that NONE of it stopped me from becoming who I am now. I had the lowest self esteem in the universe, but I clawed my way back.

I was humiliated, abused, beaten and mercilessly teased. But I'm still here. That means I won.

The best revenge is living well.

Julie
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  #130   ^
Old Wed, Nov-09-05, 16:45
klc145's Avatar
klc145 klc145 is offline
feels like today
Posts: 6,075
 
Plan: Atkins - Induction
Stats: 203.5/187.5/145 Female 5ft. 1in.
BF:
Progress: 27%
Location: Indiana
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Wow Mousesmom...your story really touched me. I cannot believe that they actually had a "most likely to commit suicide" category, that is just AWFUL!!! It is sad to think that people can be so hurtful to others. But, I like you, have experienced similar things. It is so sad that we have to treat each other so poorly...

But, like you said, "the best revenge is living well." What a great way to take something negative and turn it right around!
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  #131   ^
Old Wed, Nov-09-05, 16:46
KaiNiki's Avatar
KaiNiki KaiNiki is offline
Senior Member
Posts: 475
 
Plan: A lifestyle change
Stats: 270/248/186 Female 65 inches
BF:
Progress: 26%
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mousesmom
I was voted most likely to commit suicide by my class mates that year.
Julie


This disgusts me, what the he#& was wrong with the school that they allowed something like this!?!?!?
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  #132   ^
Old Wed, Nov-09-05, 16:52
Mousesmom's Avatar
Mousesmom Mousesmom is offline
Senior Member
Posts: 3,633
 
Plan: Atkins
Stats: 156/146.8/139 Female 69 inches
BF:
Progress: 54%
Location: Victoria, BC
Default

They created that category just for me - school scapegoat. The teachers couldn't do anything about it - some tried. My parents wouldn't help so I left the school.

Thanks for being as horrified as I am about this!!!! If anything remotely like this happened to my DD I'd be calling the police!

Julie
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  #133   ^
Old Wed, Nov-09-05, 17:12
Citruskiss Citruskiss is offline
I've decided
Posts: 16,864
 
Plan: LC
Stats: 235/137.6/130 Female 5' 5"
BF:haven't a clue
Progress: 93%
Default

Very interesting thread - tough to read though.

I'd have to say that my worst experience with this sort of thing was with my ex boyfriend.

Um...for some reason he wasn't interested in being intimate, and after a couple of years, I started asking questions (gently and kindly), and was stunned to hear that it was because I'd gained weight. He went on to tell me that he'd never had this "problem" with anyone else, and that it was all my fault for putting weight on.

That seriously hurt my feelings for a very long time. I've never felt so rejected in my whole life.

Guess that's why he's my EX boyfriend.

I'm happily married now, but geez...back then I felt awful about my body image and I began to believe I was ugly, unloveable and unwanted.
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  #134   ^
Old Wed, Nov-16-05, 07:11
cyndip cyndip is offline
Senior Member
Posts: 103
 
Plan: atkins
Stats: 282/222/199 Female 5ft3
BF:
Progress: 72%
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wow, what a thread. I just really related to so much of it. I was a size 12 through high school, I was well toned and active. and I was fat compared to my size 6 friends. I was call petunia the pig. I was oinked at. I was called Dolly in reference to my large breasts. I was made to feel inferior in every way. at home an abusive stepfather call me piglet, pig, oink. etc. and once even felt the need to take a tape measure to my butt. I was called Bertha big butt. My butt is actually kinda small in comparison to my belly and breast. I felt like I deserved all of this. I liked food. I carried alot of anger for alot of years. I carried alot of hurt. I have a husband and family who love me no matter what. I have a husband who tells me I am good, and beautiful and smart and a good mother. Its just a shame that all that is part of my past. Its a shame that as an adult I am still scared to go to the grocery store or eat in public or apply for jobs. I now carry alot of fear . slowly I am moving through the fear and here on this site I have discovered hope. I am holding onto that hope with both hands. My friends percieve me as beauty ,funny, nuturing and loving. strangers despise me. Hostility is pointed in my direction . the only other people I have seen get this type of hostility from strangers are gay men.
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  #135   ^
Old Thu, Nov-17-05, 10:40
Lessara's Avatar
Lessara Lessara is offline
Everyday Sane Psycho
Posts: 7,075
 
Plan: Bernstein, Keto IFast
Stats: 385/253/160 Female 67.5
BF:14d bsl 400/122/83
Progress: 59%
Location: Durham, NH
Smile

I haven't read this in 5 years, wow! Its funny how its so relavant now. I work in a male dominated field and I game with a male dominated group (though I will admit it has more females than any gaming group I've ever been in - and I'm 41!)
I have been trying and trying to figure out makeup and doing my hair and such to look more feminine and to look professional (for men view woman as more professional if they do this stuff)

I'm sick of it. I am still getting no more respect and I'm making myself so unhappy. I don't like makeup, I don't like doing my hair up with mouse and hairspray. I'm not saying I'm messy. I'm simple. I make sure my skin and teeth are healthy. And I will admit I'm cute. I decided to cut my hair and ditch the hair dye.
I'm going to be an example for my daughter and her friends, to show my male gaming friends that a woman is not defined by her appearance but what she does, no different that a man should be defined. I'm not trying to look sloppy or plain. I am anything but plain. But I'm not dressing up if it makes me so unhappy. I'm going to show a woman comfortable with herself. For I am

ps I am wearing what is appropriate for church, work events and so on. I am not anti-social You should see the cute little black dress I got, it goes to my knees

Last edited by Lessara : Thu, Nov-17-05 at 10:46.
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