Hi Everyone. My name is Suzanna but my friends call me Suz. I hope you will all call me Suz

I finally got brave enough to get on the scale this morning and right there and then I made up my mind to get rid of a lot of the numbers that stared back at me.

My History:
- (this will give away my age but... ) I had 20 pounds to lose in the mid-70s. I read Dr. Atkins Diet Revolution and found it made sense so I started. Lost the 20 pounds plus another 7 or so in two months. Loved it. Now I could resume my previous way of eating. Why not?
- Fast forward 10 years and 40 pounds. YIKES! I dug out Dr. Arkins' book, started low carbing again. Daily stresses, three kids, long hours at work and a crappy husband, kept me from continuing more than a few weeks and maybe 5 pounds.
- Another 15 years into the future and YIKES 100 pounds rounder. This time the kids were grown, I had a better husband and a much less stressful job. I dug in along with my husband (who needed to lose some poundage as well). The Mr. dropped out a few weeks in. I, on the other hand, did well. 20 pounds the first week.
- At the end of 12 months, I had dropped 80 pounds. Not yet to goal but felt and looked so much better.
- What made me stop? Atkins was at peak popularity. Everyone was low carbing and everyone was subtracting fibre from the carb count of food. Diabetic shops we popping up everywhere with delectable "low carb" goodies. I could have a slice pumpkin pie that had only 2 grams of carbs. Of course, I bought one. I could have low carb ketchup that had only 1 gram total carbs. Even chocolate bars and candies and bread. Real looking bread. Man, I loaded up.
- I loaded up not only in the fridge but, as it turned out, around my middle, too.
- Hunger returned. Cravings returned. Motivation left. I'll just have this one cheat meal. Then I'll just have one more, cause it's someone's birthday. And on it went.

I was lucky for many years and didn't gain back more than 5 pounds of what I had lost. Then my husband passed away. Sorrow increased my appetite rather than diminished it. The scale moved upward by 25 pounds. Two years later I lost my job.

Seven years ago, I broke my back and landed in long term care for three months. I had no appetite and in that three months lost the 25 pounds. Another 5 came off during physio.

Then, almost six years ago I met the love of my life. He loves me no matter what my size. He also LOVES to eat good food and I'm a darn good cook. The last year my weight has slowly crept up. I noticed before on my clothes and the way I moved.

Low carbing was playing around the back of my brain when I first started feeling heavier, but, my husband has only one kidney and that is only working at 30%. He is not to have more than 6 ounces of protein a day. I thought it would be far too challenging to mix two diets.

This morning was my awakening. I am stronger than I thought and I can cook for two diets. I'm retired, I have time. We are not suffering financially. I can do this. I need my strength back. I need my health back. I need to wear my lovely clothes without feeling like everything is a girdle.

I'm hoping that I can not only get support in this journey, but that I can give it as well. After all, I have enough experience.

Today's meals:
Breakfast - coffee with 18% cream (which is all I had), two eggs and 1/4 cup corned beef. Lunch - about 1/2 cup of crispy chicken skins and 1/4 green pepper. Dinner - four teeny tiny, thin lamb chops with 1/4 cup green, red peppers and 1/2 stalk celery sauteed in butter. I snacked on sugar-free jello - 1/2 cup.

I have to find my way around here and begin journaling. I joined this forum several years ago, during one of my unsuccessful attempts. I can't remember where anything is anymore. Thank you for being here. Still.