Pennink

Any advice for me? See my post above...

I am going through the very same thing right now! For me it was all the years that I just QUIT thinking about me and let myself go. Now I don't know my style or what I even look like. I called my daughter a few minutes ago and told her that I need her to take some pictures of me while I'm playing with the grandkiddos or just mingling at a family get-together so I can look at them later and see what I look like. I did go to the make-up counter recently and got a total facial makeover and bought everything they suggested and I've quit dyeing my hair that hideous too dark brown (I am very light complexioned), but am wearing nothing but black clothes because I don't know what else to try. Pennink has given me some great ideas about colorful tops to wear with my black slacks. I'm taking a week off from my job the first week of September and plan to hit the mall and try on things and try to find my style again.

As an apple shape, you need to play up the great bottom half. Try empire waisted dresses.
You're the reverse of me, so keep the dark colours on top, watch out for chunky jewellery! try those long chains with a big charm, like a metal heart or something wonderful that falls long. or resin clear beads so you have sparkle, but not drawing attention to your bosom.
Don't go skinny leg jeans with a huge top or you'll look pregnant. think about georgette tunics that flow, but have a nice flat look on your tummy.
Small flare legged pants will balance you out.
show off those legs! there are some awesome little dresses now (kind of a peasant style) that would look great!

I'd die to have nice legs. Lypo anyone?

I can really relate to this - this idea of 'not bothering' for years because of the weight gain, and then suddenly - paying attention again, and not knowing what to do...

I hope that pennink realizes how much this thread she's started is helping us all.

There's this feeling of..."Whoa...there's a *person* in there...and she needs dressing".

Before, I'd just throw on whatever. Fling my hair back into a ponytail and be done with it. Tried to just disappear into the background as much as possible (clothing wise), so as not to accentuate the weight. Blah, dreary clothing. And I didn't care.

Oh sure, I tried to dress nicely (but plainly)...but the thing is - I didn't even like the stuff I've found in the plus size stores - it was always difficult for me to find anything I liked at Lane Bryant. It seemed to me that in terms of plus size clothing (well, this is my experience anyway) that the clothing is either 'too young' or 'too old fashioned'.

And now I find myself staring in the mirror, going..."Huh? Where'd you come from?"

And ..."You mean I get to shop for stuff I like????? It's been so long that I don't even know what that is..."

Citruskiss, I'm going to take all the tips Pennink gave me and start by incorporating that into my wardrobe. This thread has been a trememdous blessing to me....just what I (and apparently alot of others) needed right now.

I have a question about the shoes!!!

I have terrible bunions so I try to wear shoes that don't hurt, or take them off asap. Since I have 6 kids and can't afford Jimmy Choos, how high do I have to go price-wise to get comfortable heels? I have a pair of Liz Claiborne's that I totally splurged on last year---paid about $40 on clearance---and they actually feel pretty good for a longer time time than usual. What do you recommend?

I am looking into a nice shirt and pants but white is a hard color to wear for me, it could be better to get a shirt that would elongate me as near as the color of the pants as possible, it is hard to be a short apple Spring.

If you get the TLC channel, watch "What Not to Wear." The hosts makeover the wardrobes of women of all sizes and shapes.

Plus, it's fun to watch them throw out the current wardrobe.

That is one of my favorite shows, Robin!

Hi-
what a fun thread! Thanks for all your help, Penni. You really know your stuff- and congrats on the promotion.

Sara (Citrus)- I feel like I could have written some of your posts- and wrote some like them- 2-3 years ago. I've been maintaining now- and will offer what I have learned after going from a 16/18 to a 4/6/8/10. Penni- please feel free to comment or correct.
1. GET A NEW BRA!!! You cannot imagine the difference a new bra in the correct size makes. I was in a 38DDD and now wear a 34DD. It is amazing. Go to a Macys or similar department store with a big 'intimates' department. Ask if they have trained bra fitters. They will measure you, then help you pick a bunch of bras. After you put them on, with your permission, they will come and look at the fit. It is really worth it- and then throw away all your old bras.
2. Size does NOT matter. Like Penni says the sizes have all changed. I wear a 4 in DKNY pants, a 6 in the Gap and my new Jeanstar jeans, and a 10 in other things. I just keep on trying and trying. My DD got me to realize that I was trying on things at least 1-2 sizes too big- no wonder it didn't look good.
3. Try on lots and lots and lots of clothes. I like places like TJ Maxx and Marshalls- you can get a shopping cart and just try on all you want. And department stores like Macys are great- find a salesperson who is dressed in a way you like and tell her you need help. Barbara was one I asked- told her I had lost over 50 lbs and did not have any idea what to wear. She still says hi to me- 3 years later! Try on all kinds of things- things that used to look good on you (my translation for stuff that covered me up) will no longer fit- trust me! I am still trying to wear more fitted clothes- it is not yet comfortable. But I am now having fun wearing new fashions and trying new things.
4. Give yourself permission to look good, feel good, and wear clothes that fit. For me, all it took was a new pair of jeans (Target- size 10) and those new bras and a few shirts and I felt like a million bucks. YOU ARE WORTH IT!

I think I've taken my own advice- so much stuff I nw have a full closet! My new rule for clothes is I have to LOVE it, it has to LOOK GREAT, and be in great shape. So I love all my new clothes- gave away all the rest. (Tried alterations- nothing ever looked right.)
Have fun-
HTH-
E

This was truly excellent - thank you so much for sharing your experience. I am sure that along with me, it will be a big help to others who are also going through that "I don't know what to wear" phase, or the 'ugly duckling' phase.

Yep - everything's all baggy.

Since it's the tail end of summer, I'm going to wait a few weeks, and then start trying on all kinds of stuff. I'm not going to buy tons and tons of things, because I'm not yet at goal - but I do think it's time for me to get a style adjustment, and definitely time to get a few clothes that actually fit me.

I had a similar experience a few weeks ago - my stepdaughter and I went shopping together, and she was the one who had to keep telling me, "No - that's too big". Then she'd pick up something and say 'how bout this?' and I'd say, "Oh, I don't think that will fit, it'll be too small".

lol!

I'll get there.

I am looking forward to this. Still got a ways to go, but I think it's ok for me to start now.

Penni - just out of curiosity - what are your personal favourite colours for this fall? Other than um...black, navy, black and more black (the old me) ?

I certainly don't have an answer for this, but I wanted to ask you something...

How do you find out if you're a 'spring' ?

It's called color analysis. There is a book called, "Color Me Beautiful" that started it all. Basically, a person's skin tones fall into four different categories, (i.e, spring, summer, autumn and winter) and they have different shades of color that look good on them. "Springs" look best in bright colors with yellow undertones, "summers" look best in more muted shades with blue undertones, "autumns" looks best in muted colors with yellow undertones, and "winters" look best in clear sharp colors. There are variations of this theory, of course.

Years ago ther was a book on color for different complexion and using the explanations plus a friend to tell you if a color looks good on you when you are not wearing any makeup. Sometimes it is too pale or too rich or too cold and make your face look sick and you go from there. I know that a certain white is good but stark white is not. I know that a melon red is better than a chinese red.