hi everyone, I've been having the most bizarre dreams lately.

my dream last night consisted of eating at different chinese buffets

I know I have been craving general tsos chicken, but that dream was so real...lol

Did it taste good??

yes that was a good dream.............

I love chinese esp sesame chicken and chicken fingers in duck sause

Hi everyone, I am so glad to have discovered this thread, even though I'm just a newbie in the forum. It always helps to read about others when people in your own family don't believe that depression is a "real" disease that can affect just about anyone. My family is supportive of me in many ways, but they think I should get off Zoloft, and I don't think I should until my life becomes more stable. I tried going off it once through a weaning process, and I had the worst panic attacks in my life.

My triggers for depression/anxiety this time around were the lack of a stable job and money problems (I'm a freelancer) and a traumatic, on- and off- relationship after being single for nearly eight years. I also went on birth control and gained a significant amount of weight. I read so much out there about how it's only water weight but I have a handful of friends who have easily put on 20+ lbs on birth control.

So maybe it was the pill that caused the depression or the weight gain or both, but all I know is that when the depression started to sink in, I started to medicate with alcohol, quit exercising and stopped following my carb-controlled regime. I'm not a food addict -- always loved veggies, salad, in short "real food" and not sweets -- but I simply started to eat more carbs, even if they were whole grain.

I'm especially annoyed at myself for taking birth control pills, because they made me gain weight twice in the past, but because I was in love I thought a few vanity pounds wouldn't matter. The truth is, my ex should've been more respectful of my body and its condition (simply doesn't react well to birth control). I think if someone loves you enough he should be sensitive to your body and not just his sexual needs.

It's so difficult to achieve balance in life and I'm totally for using meds when you need them. Right now, I'm working with a personal trainer and back on strict LC. Also looking for a full-time job. I don't just want my body from 45 pounds ago back -- I want my life back!

When you gain weight in a relatively short period of time, it's hard to look at yourself in the mirror because you don't "recognize" the person looking back at you. South Beach is right in my backyard and it's especially hard around here to keep your body confidence high, as so many folks walk around looking like they paid way too much money for the plastic surgeon!

I'm ashamed to go out as none of my beautiful "slender" clothes fit me. I know it's all in my mind, but it has been extremely difficult for me to adjust. I am trying to surround myself with people who are compassionate and can support me on the weight loss path and not people who will judge me and make me feel worse.

Well, thanks for letting me vent.

All the best,

M

Didn't manage to read every post, but another depressive and generalised anxiety disorder sufferer. Mostly at the stage of bad days and good days and just managing to keep things ticking over. Had a major episode a few years back and my main incentive is not to *ever* go back there

I've got a lot of help from various non drug therapies
- cognitive behavioural therapy (good for trying to change behaviour in particular, but also helpful with mood - lots of homework in between sessions. I had this privately for 6 months when I was *very* ill with depression a couple of years ago, and it was a real eye opener for me. I almost feel like I'd spent most of the rest of my life totally ignorant of my own needs, physical and emotional, almost like a zombie)
- psychodynamic (longer term, slower therapy, but still useful, particularly now I'm much better and my need for help isn't urgent. I get this free from a national charity in the UK)
- hynotherapy (mostly my best friend practices on me as he's currently retraining - clinical hypnotherapists have to resit their exams every few years here. It's been mildly useful, but I have to confess to not having taken it very seriously)

I'm also going to try emotional freedom therapy (EFT) and if I can ever afford it EMDR therapy though it's very expensive here.

Oh, and the book Healing without Freud and Prozac (I think it has a different title in the US) has been extremely useful. The author also has a website www.nofreudnoprozac.com

I've found the high dose omega 3's extremely helpful, maybe enough so that I can think about coming off the pills in a few months or so

Anyway, My 2p worth!

Anna

Hi Anna,

Sorry to hear about all this, but sounds like you are looking for a solution, which is the important thing. Have you tried therapeutic yoga or yoga therapy?


Hang in there,

Maria

Hi all. I would like to know how you all lose weight on your meds.
Anna

Well, I went off my antidepressants a few months ago, I think I am feeling better, more focused. I just have to lose this weight and then find a new job.

Don't say you don't have enough time. You have exactly the same number of hours per day that were given to Helen Keller, Louis Pasteur, Michelangelo, Mother Teresa, Leonardo DaVinci, Thomas Jefferson, and Albert Einstein.

this is a quote from another thread, can't remember who wrote it though, sorry......
......................................................................

Yes, and I bet these people listed above had a support system....
for the last 25 years I had no time, I raised 3 kids of my own , "1 still at home" I also raised two step kids for years......

I never had any time, not even time to sit down and read a book, I am sure we can all relate......

between going back and forth to work, and 10-12 hours spent there 5 days a week my life was hectic.

I had a husband who didnt really help with chores either. "at that time, I"ve been single for 10 years though"

Now after all of these years I have so much time, no car, no job, and no friends, no one,............things change, I guess I just have to learn to cope...yet what do I do with so much time...........by myself....It's not so fun anymore, it's going on two years without a job and 8 months with out a car.....This town has no bus system....some days I feel like crying, others I am fine and my only outlet is this forum...and.......
no one understands, they think I dont want to work.....I dont know anyone inthis town I live in, my mom who lives 130 miles away, she says some rude things to me, like what do I expect a car to fall out of the sky...., my daughter, a college graduate making 60 grand a year.........she thinks I just dont want to work or find a car, well, it's kind of difficult to get a car without any money.

p.s I have all this time and I dont even feel like working out.........any suggestions, thx

I am so tired of suffering from this depression. I am beginning to wonder whether I will ever fully recover, whether I will ever giet my life back as I knew it... What on earth are we do do when people that we know and love have given up on us because they feel that we are just feeling sorry for outselves. That we just need a relationship. That we don't care about our families, our children. That we are lazy, hopeless. It so saddens me that people have actually forgotten the person that I used to be...whatever happened to those memories. Whatever happened to the promising future that I had. Whatever happened to the story book life that I imagined. At this point I just want to be happy. I just want to not be afraid, anxiety ridden, lonely, and feel as if I am from another planet.

It is amazing how small things have slowly gotten better. But the progress that I want to make obviously hasn't happened. I can cooked a few meals for my daughter, I have gone out of the house more, I am trying to reconnect with people, trying to do more things with my daughter... It is progress, but others see it as a sign that nothing is wrong anyway... Others see it as a sign that I have just been a neglectful parent...an uncaring person... It is hard, extremely difficult to deal and live with the criticism that others feel they have a right to voice to me, to mock me and make me feel less than. It horrifies me that because of my illness they are actually afraid of me...afraid to have their children be around me... I have bipolar, not the plague and my bipolar is more depressive than anything...with occasional highs during the month in which I spend that time trying to catch up on 3 weeks of not paying bills, cleaning house, and connecting with family and friends!

I truly am fed up but I keep going because of one thing, my daughter! If it were not for her, I would have ended it a long time ago!

[QUOTE=skeeweeaka]I am so tired of suffering from this depression. I am beginning to wonder whether I will ever fully recover, whether I will ever giet my life back as I knew it... What on earth are we do do when people that we know and love have given up on us because they feel that we are just feeling sorry for outselves. That we just need a relationship. That we don't care about our families, our children. That we are lazy, hopeless. It so saddens me that people have actually forgotten the person that I used to be...whatever happened to those memories. Whatever happened to the promising future that I had. Whatever happened to the story book life that I imagined. At this point I just want to be happy. I just want to not be afraid, anxiety ridden, lonely, and feel as if I am from another planet. ]

Yes, I can relate to you; I do suffer from the same feelings and resentment, the bottom line is, most people could care less, family or not, when I went homeless with my son, I found out who my true friends and family were, and you know what; I found out I had none, that was the saddest moment in my life, of all the things I have been through. If you would ever like to talk, let me know, you can reach me on messenger or here.

I still have alot of the same feelings, most people that I knew just think that my life is a product of me.........they cannot see that they have had better things happen to them and be grateful, no; they are ungrateful for everything they have and look down on others..........that's the bottom line!! hugs, Gina

Hey Gina,

Just having a hard time. Realizing how much I have missed out on my life. Realizing how much I have to live for at the same time. How much I want to move forward and for once in a long time have some hope...small steps...baby steps...but i believe that I'll get there... When I arrive, I'm afraid, however, of what will be waiting for me!

Sorry.. have not introduced myself or anything.. need to make this quick (gut feeling that the baby will wake) you have to just DO the workout. I never EVER feel like it, it's always a long inner argument with myself and most of the times I only do it becuase I've promised someone but those few hours after my workout (which is high intensity) are truly the only time, because of the endorphins, that I feel almost normal. Lighter, and clearer somehow. The fog of depression thins for a short time it is so strange and cool. Just my experience.