OMG i'm so depressed, i eat to make myself feel better and now i can't stop. I finally finish school and realized just because i have a degree does not mean i would was a career in what i went to school for. I have a crappy job and work none stop, and I'm a single mother (love being a mom though) but I'm so depressed and now i can"t stop eating. it's like the only pleasure i have. Now I'm super fat and need enouragment on eating right again.

Now i dont leave the house, only to go to work and pick up my daughter. I know i'm fat and ugly because i wont stop eating, but i can't stop. i wonder is there more to life then whats going on now and i just hate life.
(sorry if the grammer is bad. typing fast on my way to work.)

Hmmmm. I feel for you. But I don't know WHAT I feel. You have a home, a child you adore, an education so you are obviously smart enough...and a job in a time when many are without.
I am NOT making fun of you nor suggesting that a food addiction is not real and life threatening. I am trying to give you some perspective...though I am medicted and the words may not be coming out the way I am intending. I mean well. I am NO doctor nor do I pretend to have any real answers for you but I sincerely want your best!
Job: you can take the time to get another you will enjoy more. It would appear that you are young (relative as I am 59 and changed careers at 28 AND 48 when I got tired of my work situation)...and have time to help yourself to a better job.
Being a single Mother may be tough. I think it must be tough but have no actual experience so no personal reference. But you have the smarts to overcome any obstical to your eating disorder.
Hating life. You got me there. As a handicapped war vet from a long forgotten battle that cannot walk unassisted, lives out of a recliner, and who weighs double your weight, I feel I am the most blessed person on the planet so can't help you on the hating life part. I watched the rain out my window onto the world this morning. Life is a miracle.
You are sooooo worth all the trouble of eating correctly. You owe it to you and your daughter to eat right. YOU pick the eating program/plan that is best for you and your life and there will be plenty of people in these forums here to help and encourage you.
And you have at least one member of your rooting section: me. If you choose to help yourself to a healthier life the folx behind you will be amazing.
Need anything at all, just holler.
I wish you all the happiness in the world.

thank you very much for your comments. and your totally right on evey thing...

Rosalynn, stop for a moment and consider again what Mister E has pointed out. Emotional eating does not do one any good. You point that out yourself. But the first thing you need to do is realize all you do have going for you. Then you have to work on you. The rest will fall in line.

I know i'm fat and ugly because i wont stop eating, but i can't stop. i wonder is there more to life then whats going on now and i just hate life.

Look into your little ones eyes and smile at them. See what you see in their eyes as they smile back at you. That is everything right with the world and everything right with you. I wish you could see yourself as they see you, and one day you will.

You are not fat and ugly because you eat. There is something inside you that no one else has or ever will have. that is your light, your beauty, your contribution to the world. You just need to let it shine. It is hard sometimes, but you just focus on that inner light that shines back at you from your child's eyes. Children are awesome windows into your own sole. Kids know bad when they see it, and I'm sure they don't see bad in you.

Hang in there!

(((Hugs)))

hi rosalynn , but at least you have your child , you are your child's life , you are trying to get healthy , it doesn't happen over night . you also do have a degree think if you didn't where would you be working now ,try and find something else to do besides eat , it won't happen at once , maybe just notice when it happens that's the first step .yes , there is more to life than depression and food , you will eventually feel better , do you have anyone to talk at home or work ? what about a new job ? and you are not fat and ugly ,i am currently on atkins 72 and i like it , i have lost 18 lbs in 39 days , i am on the board tonight because i am on vacation and i have eaten pizza and beer, this is the first time i have cheated but i will be back on my plan tomorrow ,what would you say to a friend in your shoes ? you wouldn't tell her she was fat and ugly ? i don't think you would , treat yourself as you would a friend , with kid gloves . good luck please keep me updated , i would like to know how you are doing.

I am totally rooting for you too--keep fighting the good fight!

BTW, about having no other pleasure in life...there are so many pleasures that are FREE. I don't know the particulars of your situation but maybe you can get outside in the sunshine for an hour a day. It will definitely help with depression. While you're there, do something you enjoy. Maybe read a book or dig into the dirt if it's not frozen up where you are. Walk the dog and the kid, play in the snow, whatever. I guarantee it will help.

since i work two jobs I can't really focus on my Career as an artist. It is what i went to school for. I can't be a starving artist (like some of my associate) because if i starve then my daughter starve. I also been applying for art teaching positions but those are really hard to get. Working too jobs and coming in the house looking at unfinished paintings is what hit me the hardest. Then i eat whatever to make me feel better.
I wish i had time to read books and knitt..
I'm going to work on it. i have to for my daughter.

I just wanted youto know I am praying for you to find JOY in your life and embrace every moment for what it is worth; which is A LOT!

I am praying for you and that your heart and attitude would change. You CAN do this. No ifs ands or buts about it! You have to change your attitude first. I know its difficult, but you can do it. Please do it. For your daughter. Life is too short.

Hey Rosalynn,

Just read your posts and wondered if you might like an email buddy to check in with one-to-one? I know you have a hectic schedule and probably have very little spare time what with working full time and being a mum, but if you're up for it, let me know your email (or tell me how to PM you). I really hope you're doing ok, here's to a new year eh?

all the best

bingobanjo

I want to just hug you to death,..... sometimes it is good to feel like you have fallen to the bottom.... Because then up is all there is up, Back in the late1970's I was a single Mom of 3 little children, 4, 3 , and 9 months. Left to put a roof and food in our tummys. NO ONE to help me. I was so frightened, and a Diabetic that couldn't afford food or meds. I ate once a day, and on weekends I fed my kids and if they had anything left on there plate I would eat that. I just kept putting one foot in front of the other.. My Baby sitter included 3 meals and 2 snacks for my kids. I made 6 dollars a hr, and had a rent of 450, and a sitter bill of 110 a week. As you can see I had no food money.... On Dec 3rd of 1982 I lost my job to a Silicone Valley major fall out of jobs, Like we are going through now. I freaked, My family turned there heads, I pounded the pavement to find a job, I begged for help, the State wouldn't help me they had a Million Vietnam people that came to the US and to CA that needed help....Well all the while I was out looking for a job, Dec 24 late that night My Mother caved and brought gifts for the kids from Santa with a lecture behind it. That Monday after Christmas I got home from looking for a job, it was pouring rain, and gave my kids baths and got them to bed, and a Pounding at the door, I ran to it, and it was a women From Western Union and she said are you ever home during the day, I said nope I have been looking for a job, she said open this, I did and it was the Company I had gotten layed off from, they gave me another job,, thank God, I sat down and cried. While pounding the pavement, I was sick with Hepititis that I got from the company Christmas party....
So My point is, always look up, and keep Hope in your heart. Look in the faces of your children and let this lead you on your way. Life has ups and downs and mountains to climb, but on the down side it is like a Pasture of full bloom flowers
We learn from all our struggles, it makes us who we are, and stronger..
Make some goals and focus on them, smell the roses, bathe yourself in Self Love hugs Debbie

i also suffer from depression, if you'd like to talk, my email is ginasatterlee~gmail.com


mine is real bad right now.....and food has been like a friend to me and helps lonliness....

please write, maybe we can help each other. hugs.

sure ladyroz1~gmail.com

your amazing, that was really inspirational. your right the only other place to go is up.

i will be emailing you!