Sure!
1- start a journal here and use it to vent about what you are feeling ....
2- have you tried OA meetings?
3- there is a section on this forum for emotional issues that I think you should check out.

and if nothing else, its not about your weight any more....now its about your health and your life!! How much more serious do you need it to be before you make a decision that you have to do this!!??

My very best wishes to you on your journey!!