lol I was ready in my mind... I just needed time for my body to adapt, and to inhale information.

(I said around the 3-month mark, my hunger issues drop off, and when did I manage my first fast? Just about the 3-month mark.)

I've been grateful for the solid information, with good sources. It's been so incredibly helpful.




So today... Woke up... BG was nice and "normal". (86 if I recall.) When it was time for my morning "coffee", it was only up to 93. That's a LOT less dawn-phenomenon than I was having a few weeks ago!

I had a good lunch (Chipotle salad, with guac. It was a treat, and I know from experience that the way i order it, has very few carbs and doesn't throw my body out of whack), and 2 hours later, my BG was all the way up to 110.

Then, a friend was leading a Zen meditation tea ceremony. I drank 4 teas, 2 of them green, of those two, one tasting like it had grain in it. *cringes*

After the ceremony was over, I took a 1 hour drive, got out of my car feeling "odd". Tested... 136. (Hadn't EATEN in 6 hours at that point, only drunk several small cups of unsweetened tea.)

So I'm going with the theory that the tea was "contaminated" with grain (pretty common, in Asian context, to add grain to green tea), and so I'm starting another fast tomorrow. Hubby won't be home until after bed time, so I can skip dinner, too... possibly even extend it into Tuesday, depending on how things go. Because, dangit, I refuse to lose ground. I'm getting very close to the place where my Doc wants to evaluate the effectiveness of my self-treatment-plan, before getting out her prescription-pad.

Part of me has been fighting with the very idea that I "really" have diabetes (all the while acting as if it's true). I've got a lot of (irrelevant to this board) emotional baggage around that concept, for some very specific reasons.

I've come to terms with the fact that yes, I do. (The BG monitoring that Janet pushed for and my doc said not to worry about, helped considerably. What I see there only makes sense if I am diabetic.) I've also done enough reading to confirm what I already knew: I have a much better prognosis if I never get on the mediations. If I can control it with diet, I address the condition, not the symptom. Once I'm on the medications, even if it's one that doesn't raise insulin levels, I feel like there's more risk. I have to be more careful if I fast. I have to be more careful if I exercise. And I could theoretically "indulge" once in a while, which... I'm prone to depression. Big, bad, scary levels of depression. When that hits, I could rationalize indulging, if there were medication to offset it. We all know that it doesn't really work that way, but when you're that level of irrational, you just want something that feels good "right now", and sometimes that looks like carbs.

Not defending emotional eating. Saying I know me, and I don't trust me, if I've got a drug that anyone on the planet things will "cancel out" carbs. Depression is a big ugly monster that sits over there and whispers poison in my ear, and does not have my best interests at heart, and it's how I got back to this size to begin with. After years of successfully keeping the weight off and my health up with LC. So I'm cutting off the arguments.



No, Janet, you haven't nagged. You've given me solid info. You've pointed me to knowledge and resources that I would have otherwise lacked. Every time you say a thing, you back it with links to solid research and more information. I always read it. (Not necessarily all of it the instant I read your reply. Sometimes I skim, get the gist, go, "Oh, I need to check out a book..." (Other times I may well sit down and read it all on the spot.)

Sometimes, I can follow the suggestions. Sometimes, I need to go shopping first, or wait for my body to get to the right place... But I haven't seen one suggestion you've ever made that wasn't backed to the eyeballs in solid research. You have proven yourself credible and knowledgeable, and I value the fact that you have so persistently shared your valuable knowledge with me.