Some of us have been around this place for years. Every January, we see the an influx of people who make a post, start a journal, post menu's, join discussions -- and then drop out of sight.
I'm here to tell you that if you let it, this place can be of enormous help on your journey. If you use its resources and community, it will be more helpful to you than you could ever imagine. I think this is partly because obese people like me tend to want community. There are things we need to say that we can't say much of anywhere else. There are discussions we need to have that a person half our size has no way to empathize with. We like to talk about these issues with people who are facing them, not with people who cannot fathom why we just don't "eat less, move more."
You can vent here, especially in TDC, to people who have walked a mile in your shoes. You don't have to explain to them the fear of humiliation when you want to sit in a folding chair, but are afraid to. When I began, I found it to be one of the most cathartic things I have ever done. For me, these were discussions that I couldn't or wouldn't have in person.
That's not to say this ought to be a "woe is me" whine center. It is also a way to help make yourself accountable. Talk about what you have done and why. I loathe to change my weight up, when I backslide, but I do it. I somehow feel accountable to the others here when I fail. That is a good thing. This place is not good just for cathartic discussion and accountability, it's good for victory celebrations and congratulations.
I recommend a journal. I don't update mine daily anymore, but for the first year or so I was here, that was my crutch and my source of strength. It helped me hash out an understanding of my state of thought when I was much fatter, and how I got to be that way. That is self-discovery worth doing.
It is also extremely good place for information. Read the Media & Discussions area. There are some extremely sharp people who can break down the latest study to help you understand why foods or diet react certain ways. If you want to know more about the metabolic reason you got fat (and you should) then that is invaluable. I'm not scientific, but I can follow it the way some of our fellow members here explain it.
As a guy, I never was much interested in cooking. I didn't know beyond some very basics how to cook
anything that I couldn't grill. If you think about it, investing the time to learn to cook can also make this thing work for you. Food is a vital piece of life and food really needs to occupy part of your time and creativity if you really plan to succeed.
Finally, my biggest piece of advice is that you should find a guiding principle to what you are doing and why. My first was that I was doing this so I could be a better father. But that wasn't true. It was something I needed to do for me, so I could live longer, be healthier, and enjoy life better. Those things let me be a better father. But this belongs to
me, not my girl. It wasn't fair to project that on her. If you project it onto someone else, or some extrenal thing, I think you will fail. It has to be for you.
My guiding principle is that life as a fat person is the hardest thing I've ever done. I didn't realize how hard it was until I lost a lot of weight. It is much harder than sticking to any way of eating. So that has been my guideline, when I want to stray. I know how hard it is sometimes to pass up certain foods. But I
also know how hellishly hard life was at 350 pounds.
This thing is hard. You have to be willing to learn about nutrition, about food, about yourself, about cooking, about some self-denial.
But it ain't nothing compared to being fat.
Good luck in your efforts. Most of you, like most dieters, will not be able to make the jump. Most diets, even low carb ones, fail. That's just reality. I don't say that from arrogance, being 60 pounds overweight myself. The jury is still out on me. But at least it hasn't come back with a conviction yet, and that's all I can ask.
Now, get yourself in the game.
