Your fat around your midsection could have happened because of excess cortisol levels. I hate to say it, but you really do sound like you are somewhere on the adrenal fatigue/exhaustion continuum (depression, unable to deal with stressful situations, allergies, inflammation). Adrenal fatigue leaves a person open to developing an auto-immune disease. If this is your problem, you will unfortunately never get all the help you need from a typical doc practicing conventional medicine.

I don't mean to sound like such a downer and I don't want to depress you. If it helps, my doctor a few years back said I had "lupus-like" symptoms and tested me. Every test I've ever had done has come back normal. I have known something was wrong for years (since my mid twenties). There was a time when I was worried about RA too. I woke in the morning feeling so stiff, I had numbness and tingling all over the place. I even had the sensation of my left leg from the knee down of being asleep. This sensation lasted for at least a year. Most people would think there was something seriously wrong with them if they were feeling those symptoms, and I sure did. I've had lots of normal tests come back and quite frankly look spectacular on paper from a medical standpoint. Now I know what is wrong with me, but my doctor doesn't.

Pray your tests come back normal, they really might. You can have lots of hope. In his book on adrenal fatigue, Dr. Wilson says any time you have inflammation, it is because you don't have enough cortisol circulating. That's why people get allergies. It could explain the swelling on you fingers too. I sure hope so.

Oh I hope I haven't frustated you. I know you just want to be the best mom you can to your little kids. You deserve to be able to enjoy this special stage of their lives.