Jandy,

I have been in that place, and it's a difficult and dark one - so sending big cyber hugs to you. And well done on reaching out for help - when I've fallen into that place I'm often so stuck I can't reach out to others. That's a very good self-caring move and a good sign that you are getting back on track.

It's such a personal thing so what's worked for me may not work for you, but I'd like to offer it up in case it may be of use.

What's worked:
- deciding to be as loving and kind and understanding to myself as possible
- trying to take a pause before eating emotionally. Try to be still and sit with yourself. Ask what it is you really need that you are trying to soothe by eating. Try and address that. If you don't know, just take a walk and tell yourself that after the walk, if you still need to eat, you will. But try to eat in a loving, nourishing way. Try to eat slowly. Afterward do not turn on yourself. Be especially kind - you need to stay on your own side
- start exploring other things that soothe you besides food. Try them out. Could be holing up in your bed with trashy mags and a face mask, taking a bath, meeting a good friend for a chat, playing a musical instrument...try old ones that have helped, try new ones too.
- when you are ready, start to look at the life issues that are causing the stress eating. Maybe they are too big to solve, maybe not. If they seem to big to solve, think of how you can make living with them easier. Maybe you can start doing tiny doable steps to improving things. Just doing something small can sometimes shift something big.
- make a plan for healthy eating but be gentle and don't 'force' it. As soon as you tell yourself, that's it I will never do A again, I will only do B....well it's a recipe for disaster for many of us. When it comes to food, willpower isn't enough and we tend to rebel when we try to rigidly force ourselves into things before we are ready. Do try to eat nourishing, yummy, healthy things. Eat them slowly and with love.

- talk to loved ones. The more you can open up to friends, the less alone you will feel and the more loved and safe you will feel. When you feel loved and safe, overeating is not needed so much

What hasn't worked:
- turning on myself, hating myself, desperately trying to force myself into a new plan before I'm emotionally there
- hiding out alone, not asking for help
- under eating to compensate for the overeating

Gosh this list could go on forever, so I'll just stop there and send you lots of wishes that you are back on track really soon. I am pulling for you Jandy