One thing that might help is that psych studies show that shyness can be UNlearned. If shyness is the problem, you need practice!
Have any men friends who are willing to go to dinner and work on your small talk?
Any girl friends willing to go to parties or social situations and take turns chatting with strangers?

Here's a helpful link:
http://members.aol.com/cybernettr/shyness.html

No one who knows me now believes I USED TO be shy. Now I can go up to anyone and get into a conversation, and part of my job is business mixers, meetings, and speeches. Part of what helped me get over it was working in New York City...you must be assertive there!
But since that option is not available to you, you have to work your way into situations. Part of it is that you've never done it, you don't know what to expect, you never do it, and round and round you go.
Remaking your image is a big boost, and you got a lot to be proud of. So get out there and shine!