I got married!

(And got on birth control...started cooking the high-carb foods that HE likes...and went into "celebration" mode for about a year where I ate anything I darned well pleased!)

~ lisa in md:

oh i would be curious to know what you really think - as i said several times before i CAN stand any kind of comment or criticism so feel free to put your feelings in words an let us all know what you think of my statements.

BTW. trainerdan has alo got an avatar where hes only wearing shorts so i dont see why i shouldnt post a picture of my physique - well in the end this is what we are talking about, right?!

Personally, I pretty much take ppl at face value, even online (I guess that would be type-face value ). I mean, there's no way we can really know whether or not someone is representing themselves honestly or not, so my default is to believe them until I see evidence not to. Also, Levi has posts in CKD that pretty much indicate he knows a little something about body building.

Cheers,

Friday

I will say that I've never, in my life, understood someone who thought that they should post their mostly naked body anywhere. Again, I'm probably a couple generations behind you in my upbringing (raised by my grandparents) so I believe I have a whole different outlook on looks, etc. If being overweight weren't so darn unhealthy, I wouldn't care about it. Thin, fat, doesn't matter, never had any problem attracting male attention when I wanted it and I do attribute that to my upbringing and the no-nonsense (depression area) attention or lack of attention that looks were paid.

What you did, who you were, how you treated other people and not considering anyone below you and realizing that there's some things you shouldn't ask and if you really feel the need to do so, you better learn to do it in the nicest way possible were the things I was taught. I would rather speak the truth or not say anything in most situations. I believe that you would find me, uh, brutally honest when the situation warrants it and smart enough to know when not to say something just because I WANT to say it or because I'm THINKING it.

I just added something to the Lighter Side about the death of common sense and I guess this entire topic has gotten my dander up and it's time for me to realize I don't really have anything to add to this and it appears I might be trying to provoke you & that really wasn't my intent. Just because I KNOW better doesn't mean, even at 40, I always practice what I was taught

Your hubby is one lucky guy, you are a beautiful woman!

I, also, was not offended by Levi's question because I have asked myself the same thing. In my case, it was a combination of factors. I became overweight as a child after a very long series of illnesses that made physical activity prohibited. In college I 'dieted' -- often going to bed early so I would not feel the hunger pangs and got down to an acceptable weight. I married and a couple of years later the weight began to creep back. When I was pregnant with my first child, surprisingly, I gained very little weight with the pregnancy and was more slim after my daugther's birth! I continued to lose weight by eating very little -- often it would be 9:00 at night and I would realize that I had not eaten yet. I also was a very heavy smoker -- sometimes 3 or 4 packs a day! I suppose I was pretty close to being anorexic -- I was 5'7" and weighed 119 pounds.

I stayed at that weight for 3 years until I became pregnant again. That pregnancy was totally different! I just kept gaining and gaining weight -- the less I ate, the more I gained until I had gained 50 pounds! It took 2 years of struggling to get back down to a reasonable weight after the birth of my second daughter. Things went along quite well for a few years -- I stayed at home with the children, grew a huge garden which I tended by hand, canned and froze most of our foods and made everything from scratch -- no processed foods. My children did not know what potato chips or Twinkies were until they started grade school and saw what the other kids had in their lunches! McDonalds was a VERY RARE treat -- maybe twice a year.

Then I quit smoking, and the weight started to creep up again. I also started working outside the home and lack of time made me turn to pre-packaged convenience foods (pastas, pizza, etc.) In an effort to keep the weight down, I did what the medical profession told me to do. I ate things like chopped veggies mixed with non-fat yogurt on pita bread, etc. I also started walking -- about 5 miles a day at 4 mph. But the weight just kept creeping up. When I asked my doctor why, she told me that I was probably gaining muscle from so much walking. And the weight creept up some more. Doctors just told me to eat less and exercise more -- eat less fats, more carbs, etc., all of which made me gain even more.

Then, my life became so frantic that I quit exercising all together. My 16 year old daughter had a baby, and my husband and I had to raise him (he is now 8 years old). My mother has Huntington's Disease and my father needed help caring for her. So, every day after work I would go home, take care of my grandson, and after he was in bed, go to my parents to help care for my mother, come home, go to bed, and start over again the next day. I was too exhausted and too pressed for time to even think about exercise, so, the pounds really started to pile on then! I even started smoking again after 11 years in an attempt to stop the weight gain and de-stress! Finally, age 50 was a turning point for me. I found a program that would provide care for my mother, quit smoking, and started low carbing.

It has been over a year now since I began this WOL -- I exercise 6 or 7 days per week and eat right. The weight is not really coming off the way I hoped -- only lost 25 pounds in 13 months and I've been stalled at the same weight for several months. My doctor told me last week that I 'have a metabolic disorder' and the only way I will lose weight is to eat only 500 calories a day! I truely hope he is wrong about that!

Well, that's my story -- so how did I get so obese? I guess that, just like most others here it was a combination -- lack of exercise, processed carb foods, genetics, etc.

TRiggs: I haven't been complimented like that since before I got married! You just made my day!

Of course, I also believe that we women don't compliment one another as much as we should, so let me echo the compliment you've been given. You are a very attractive woman! I think that if I write something like that people might think I'm hitting on them so I don't do it. Hmmm, does that make me homophobic?

I agree totally about the compliment thing...in fact, I believe that we ALL need to develop a healthy lifestyle of complimenting and encouraging one another...not just for appearances, but for all of the qualities/talents/skills we have.

I believe God gave us minds and mouths to be used with purpose. There is no sense in tearing others down with our words... We have such powerful tools right in our mouths, you know?

I'm sure many of us can relate to being made fun of as youths when our peers were all the "perfect weight" and we were chosen last for all of those sports events while growing up.

My mother taught me that it's easier to overcome evil by doing good and sometimes we just have to "kill people with kindness" instead of lashing out. (Easier said than done.)

So let me applaud you, Lisa...for holding your tongue in this most precarious thread. (In fact, it's getting so heated in here that I think I might just duck out for good!)

My hubby says it's one of the things he really likes about me...I'm spicy. Of course, I'm sure there have been occasions where he wishes he could cool it off a little bit. Like when we're driving into the city and it seems to be "Idiots Day Out" because, with the windows up I don't mind saying what I think of the nuts on the road

I think one of the major things for me is not saying something that there's nothing that can be done...as a stupid example, telling someone they have a run in their stockings because what are they going to do? No point in pointing it out to them because I truly believe doing stuff like that is done for no purpose other than making the person pointing it out feel superior. There is no point in telling someone something that they can't do anything about. Bad example, but I'm just remembering my sister pointing it out to SIL at a family function. My sister hasn't learned the finer points of tact and she is one who doesn't believe that just because you THINK it doesn't mean you should SAY it. I'm thinking she's getting a bit long in the tooth not to realize that, but maybe someday.

Folks,

Unfortunately I had to moderate a few posts here (removed). If you cannot debate without insults, then don't.

Instead of closing this thread, which turned out to be very intelligent and informative, we will simply moderate repeat offenders to preserve the dialogue from degenerating.

Wa'il

Garrison

For the record, I think you're beautiful, too. Your pic reminds me of Kate Bush (the singer).

Cheers,

Friday

Well Levi, I think you've asked a very good question.


I started out life thin, and went through high school thin, in fact, I was a female version of you! It's so sad when I look at my pictures then. I was into weights and Martial Arts was my life. Then I had my first child. Now, that in itself was not what made me obese. I spent the first five months of my pregnancy in Germany. I don't think that their diet was terribly different from mine at the time, but the low-fat diet industry is not in Europe as it is in the US. I gained a normal weight and had my daughter. Then I decided it was time to get dieting to lose the baby weight. I lost on a low fat, low carb diet. I didn't know it was low carb at the time and was lucky to get down to a decent weight before I became pregnant with my second child. Then the third child. In between my pregnancies, I did everything I knew to diet. It was all low fat. I figured I just wasn't trying hard enough. My fat intake per day was under 20 grams, and up to last year, I went down to 10 grams a day in desparation. I exercised 6 days a week for 45 minutes to 2 hours, even though I was dead tired. I starved for weeks and months doing what was the doctor's and nutritionist's and magazine's and health report's ideal diet. You know what happened. I gained weight. I gained and gained, until I was 224 lbs. I had honestly put all of my willpower and strength into it and failed.

This was February 15, 2002 when I decided that I was destined to be obese. Then, my mother came up to me and told me about low carb. I figured, well, I've done all the normal stuff, why not try this. I was very cynical. You see to the left that I lost about 60 lbs. My mother and I talked about our heritage (Our ancestors are from Southwestern Germany) and our diet when I was young, and you know what? We were all eating fairly low carb until we started reading about low-fat. I really believe our heritage is connected to our diets, and this has caused me to think about different diets and why we need to accept that not everyone can diet the same way. My husband is 6' and 150 lbs. He eats carbs from 5:30 in the morning until 9:00 at night. He never has a problem, in fact, he's lost a couple of times and had to gain back. His heritage is completely different from mine.

Anyway, my point in this is that I think America's problem is an overbearing, rich, aggressive diet industry. Who do you think got that whole food pyramid started? 6-8 servings of bread per day! 4-5 servings of fruit and vegetables. Vegetables yes, fruit??? I hate fruit, so I'm biased, however, fruit is terrible for me.

Anyway, I'll get off my soap box and let you read the other's opinions.


Amber

Levi,

I feel that your question is brutally honest and blunt. There is a saying over here in America "A teaspoon of sugar makes the medicine go down." ... So, your questions was received wrong.

But, it did provoke a flurry of activity and response (emotional and otherwise), which DOES make it a good post. As others have covered, I think TACT is the key here, but seeing that your English (as good as it is) is not your first language, that is understandable.

I will add that I didn't enjoy being dragged into your defense. I agree that if you put in the work and dedication to change your body into what you want, then you have a right to show it.

BUT, my avatar is there because I was overweight at one point. Anyone who cares to read my story in the SUCCESS STORIES can see that. I like to think of my avatar as inspiration, but if it offends people, I will put my clothes on.

FWIW, swimming shorts and a SPEEDO (I actually thought they were posing trunks) are two different worlds, but, having been to Europe, I know that Speedos are the accepted norm in bathing wear. You won't catch me on here wearing anything smaller than what you see in the avatar I am currently using.

The bodybuilding subculture is hard to understand to those who aren't in that world, and 5% bodyfat is quite an achievement. I respect you for getting to it. But, it IS hard for those outside of "the game" to understand why someone would subject themselves to it. That is not meant to offend anyone here that is not into BB.

It is a two-way street. BBers can't be expected to impose THIER values on those who are not BBers. But those who are not BBers also should not condemn those who choose to pursue it. It is a personal decision. Done properly, bodybuilding can be a lifelong pursuit and part of a healthy active lifestyle. I know of a few 70 + men who work out at my gym, and I see them as inspiration. I HOPE I look as good as they do when I get there ...

Levi, I understand that in BB circles 251 at 20% is considered fat, BUT in medical standards 20% is normal for men, and is a fit level for women. I plan to see 250 when I bulk this autumn, and it may be hard for most to understand, but there IS evidence that supports the value of this to those who have the pursuit of gaining as much muscle mass as possible. My ULTIMATE goal is to be a lean 230 - 235 with 9% bodyfat, which I will then maintain.

Pointing fingers on a forum that IS a support forum for LC dieting may not have been a wise choice of action.

This discussion is a good one, and a few years ago, I would have been pissed too. BUT, I will say that it took someone close to me to insult me that got me into a mode where I wanted to change myself ... and I have never looked back.

SOOOOO ... to answer your question Levi, I gained my weight originally through the nasty combination of inactivity, fTV watchinng, lack of exercise, fast food/large portions served at restauraunts here, and weekend drinking binges. I also lay blame to the Amarillo Cheese Fries at Lone Star, which I would order woth DOUBLE dipping sauce. :shudders:

Americans have a close relationship to their automobiles, and drive most anywhere. When I visited Europe, the first thing I noticed (in Dublin) was the relative absence of overweight people. Then, I also noticed the large number of people using bicycles as a mode of transportation.

Could be a connection??

Levi -


Why are you asking the question?


You are on a low carb forum.

Common sense would tell you that if we are all low carbing, we did not all get here through consuming too much protein.


If you are low carbing, then you know the effects of high carbing. You'll know what that does to people.

I think your question was mischevous and serves no informative purpose on the forum.

If I need to spell it out, I will.


We are the way we are through : High carbing, doctors telling us that we should eat less fat, exercising and poor diet meaning we see no results and then throw the towel in which means sitting around eating comfort high-carb food and gaining more weight, failure to understand the science of our bodies with doctors not too far behind us, repeated failures at weight loss and being catapulted up the scales.

If a male gets to 300 pounds, your question seems to imply that they have let themselves get there.

Do you think we choose to be this way? Maybe some of us don't notice the weight creeping on, but many of us have fought tooth and nail. I have.

I have battled for a number of years but the weight has beaten me. I have not reached this stage without a fight.

Your question implied that we consent to our situations. This is the narrow-minded view of the general public, promulgated by doctors. They tell us that is we just exercise more and eat low fat, the weight will disappear. If we do not, then we have nobody to blame but ourselves.

On a low carb forum, I cannot believe that this needs to be spelled out.

I think you do not need it spelled out. I think you knew precisely what you were doing when you asked the question.

Whatever your mother tongue, tact crosses all territories. Even if you said it badly, I think it is clear what you wanted to say.

A cursory glance at the website would have led you to links to answer your own question. So you are not that interested in the answer.

I think you were frankly being mean.