was broken up with last week...feel so distraught and upset...can't eat...not sleeping...when I do sleep i wake up with chills and sweating...i'm having extreme anxiety and depression...crying constantly...cannot focus...people keep saying it'll get better, you'll be fine - that' not making things any better...i don't want to feel so torn apart and honestly he doesn't seem as torn and almost confused at why i'm still so upset...4 days later and i'm suppose to be completely over being in love? Not sure why I'm posting this...to vent I guess...the people in my life are of no help rght now...they are relying on jokes and that's not making it better..i've lost 7-9 since tuesday from the inability to eat

Breaking up is hard and your reactions to it are normal. When DH and I went through a rough patch I could only eat a teaspoon of yogurt at a time. I took long walks and cried a lot. It did get better but it took time.

Maybe a suggestion is to write a list of things that you can do now that that you are going solo. But whatever, hang in there.

Sophia - I am sorry. Heartbreak is horrible. The truth is...there's probably nothing that anyone is going to say that is going to make you feel better. Time is the only thing that will help. I would probably try not communicating with your x right now. You need time to heal. I had a very tough heartbreak and the only way I got through it was cutting all ties with my x. It was one of the most difficult things I ever did. I never spoke to him or saw him again. At the time, I thought I was going to die. And I was positive that I would never find anyone else. Long story short, I was very wrong and am very happily married with a beautiful child. I'm only telling you this because when the time is right, you'll find yourself in a relationship with someone that treats you like a queen and loves you more than you thought possible...and this break up is setting you on the path to that life. Take care of yourself.

That gives hope to know that feeling like I am dying is normal and that other people have lost someone their were completely in love with to find someone a million times better. I haven't cut ties yet though Ineed to...with facebook it makes it hard...you want to know what's going on...but I know the day his status includes a girl or something it will hurt worse...I should just delete him from my facebook and avoid him...but it's hard to do...

I agree with Blackstone, it is one of the most difficult things to go thru and it is best to cut all ties with the x.

My heart is breaking for you, nobody deserves to go thru such pain.

I speak from experience, I was married to my highschool sweetheart for over nine years, we separated, his choice, divorced and cut all ties (we had no children, thought that I could not). I thought that I was going to die, went thru everything that you are right now.

I remarried, now have 3 wonderful children and a husband that loves me to death and treats me like a princess.

Just a sidenote, I recently recieved a friend request from him, I accepted it and we chatted some, I have even seen him, (he is handyman and did some work on my house for me) it was 21 years and 7 months since I had spoken to him or seen him. I am in such a different place in my life as he, I would have not been able to have healed and let go if I would have been in contact with him all those years. I won't lie, it did take a long time.

Hang in there, keep yourself busy, surround yourself with friends and family and by all means eat, don't let him win by you making yourself ill.

Roxanne

Sophia, I really feel for you. Someone close to me recently went thru the same thing and it was so painful to see. But, there was nothing I could do to change the other person's heart. I agree with the others, that cutting off contact is the best(even tho it is so so hard). Don't drag out the old pictures and letters. and, yes, you have to block him on facebook

Try to find ways to get your mind off of it. Find FUNNY movies, go to a comedy show, if you believe in God, find comfort in him. Get out into nature and take a walk. Spend time with someone less fortunate than yourself. Just do anything you can to look at the good things in your life that you are grateful for. It will be hard at first but the more you focus on the positive, the easier it will get.

I suffer from long term depression and it comes and goes and when I am in the depths of it, it is something I don't wish on anyone. I can tell you this, things WILL get better for you. No one knows when or how, but someday you will be able to look back on your relationship and you won't have to cry about it.

big hugs to you. I hope you are feeling better soon
Sandy

Sophia,

Recently went through the same thing, actually kind of what pushed my weight loss into overdrive. Not sure how old you are (25?) its hard, but you'll get it over it. Cut off all contact (even if you think theres still hope) and work out, improve yourself and show him what he missed out on -

I hoep this article helps to explain why you feel so terrible. I found it very interesting.

http://news.sympatico.ctv.ca/home/b..._finds/b54b120f

I've been able to eat a little, but I'm sleeping excessively. I am just restarting my medication for depression and OCD. I think had I taken then as I should have, this may have been a little easier? I do not understand how someone just wakes up and changes their mind when things are going great. I haven't taken him off FB yet, but I have hidden him so I cannot see anything about him. He spoke to me for a few days by texts acted like we could be friends. I pretended I could, then he never said another word...I feel like did I ever matter? How can he not contact me when we had contact every day for so long? How can he just not miss me or care? I'm confused...Part of me just wants to see a text on my phone, just something...As soon as I don't feel so tired (maybe with school ending next week) I will exercise a lot and make sure I look great...I gave so much, I just don't understand...I feel like a blind fool...but I know I have to keep going because sooner or later it has to get better...it has to --- sorry so long --- thanks for the replies

Deb - The article is right. He was very much an addiction and habit. I still keep checking my phone, yet there's nothing there...

That is odd. did he give you any sort of reason for it? How long were you guys together? I hope the meds help you. I often think about getting some but I am chicken.

what are you going to school for?

hugs hon