Hi. I can relate. When I was a depressed teenager, food was my only friend. I don't think I could have done this when I was that age... unless I had knowledge and faith that giving it up would honestly clean up my brain.
I think we should debunk the myth that aaaaaaalll these people are eating like kids and getting away with it. 95% of the time, they're not. Let me give you a few examples of people in my life who appeared to eat all kinds of junk and stay thin:
- 25-yr-old friend of mine, but after I got to know her, she revealed that she has Crohn's disease (I think it was), has had seven surgeries, and not a lot of her guts left.
- Teenage co-op placement coworker who didn't have a paying job; he'd pocket the bus fare his parents gave him and walked to and from school. At least 3 miles each direction by my estimate.
- Eating disordered people, including ME once. The times I'd eat a chocolate bar or junk in front of people, that was just me playing normal. They had no idea that'd be all I'd eat in a span of three days.
...so don't assume anything about anyone by what you see them eat in front of you.
Even more recently, in a healthier context, I have coworkers who assume I can eat whatever I want and stay thin... just because they see me eat sausage patties, bacon, cheese, etc.
Furthermore: a lot of the people who don't have those issues and still seem to stay miraculously thin despite eating junk, are NOT likely to get a free ride. Just wait until they start pushing 40 - it will catch up to them in the form of chronic disease.
SO. Long story short: it sounds like you're well aware that the sugar is acting as a happy drug. The good news is, you will feel better once it's out of your system and your brain chemicals sort themselves out again. Hang onto that.
Start a challenge thread here, or a journal, or somewhere that you can vent and have others cheer you on. Once you're over that hump, it will get better. For me, it was critical to put binge junk eating out of a job.