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Marvin Marvin is offline
Senior Member
Posts: 374
Like a Dream.....140 Pounds gone forever. *Pics at end of story
Posted by Marvin
Posted Fri, Sep-16-05
Male 5'7
Plan: my own
Stats: 286/168/-
BF:almost.
Progress: 121%
Location: California
Smile Like a Dream.....140 Pounds gone forever. *Pics at end of story

Hello, Welcome


Hi, thank you for checking in on my story. Let me introduce myself I am a 25 year old male from California who has lost nearly 150 pounds due initially to Atkins and have used this web site as support and motivation. The stories and what people have accomplished here are awesome.


"Sighs"..... a success story haw, well...... "sighs again" ....I guess so. To tell you the truth I don't even know were to begin. I'll just begin like this -


It's been magical.


Well first lets just say that this whole journey can be quantified as an experience like a dream..... a dream that came true. And for me, it is something that I would have never ever imagined in a thousand years that I would have accomplished.

Firstly in this small concoction of thoughts and reflections, I would like to make several points... and the first one being and most important - losing weight is NOT Easy!!!!!!

And the emotions and reflections that come along the way are indeed life changing - a lesson learned and teaching that is more valuable than anything money can buy.

I'm sure most of you who ever struggled with weight know it as a feeling. And it IS a feeling. It can be different for each for us. In my case, this whole adventure was a unique mix of introspectively and self-teaching gratification that I hope everyone achieves. It was the struggles, feeling of self-worth or lack of, depression, and the edge of revenge all mixed into one giant milkshake like emotion that drives me most of all. And revenge you ask? Yes.

I’ll get to that later.

Ok, well let me begin by saying that I was overweight ALL my life. I was a large child, a fat teenager and an obese young adult. Actually, I was a normal sized kid until around the age of 5 or 6 when I began to gain the weight. I’m not sure why or how it began so early, but by the time I was in my early twenties I had reached a weight of almost 300 pounds at 5 feet 7 inches in height. I have no excuses, well I think my thyroids might have a tad bit to do with it (not verified though), but I did not eat well at all. Also, my family has a history of obesity and diabetes. And hence being this large was extremely hard.

During high school years, in particular, is when the hardships truly skyrocketed. I struggled with severe emotional damage and self-worth issues caused by my weight. I weighed at least over 250 pounds throughout all four years. Yes I had friends, but not many and I never reached the full social potential that I should of been capable of. As with many things in my life, the quantified experiences, as in this case high school, I feel, were missed. It was the little things that really bothered me. Never going on dates, missing out on simple things, like just “hangin out”, dances etc. ... that tormented me. Phys-ed classes in particular, as an example, were a struggle and embarrassing. In general, however, socially I was closed off, always have been shy, and extremely self-conscious. I was constantly in fear of others, what they thought (of me), comments that they would make, or how I was perceived even to myself. I found that I saw myself often times in different light then what others had saw of me. I did not want this. To make a long story short, let me say that I had my fair dose of teases, taunts, jokes, and everything that comes along with adolescence, teenage years growing up, and being overweight. Most of my college years were the same or in some cases a magnified version of my high school and teenage experiences. I became, and for the most part, still am an outsider - basically a loner in search of oneself.

Emotionally I became cut off, neglected and socially underdeveloped. So yes, I had to change. ....

I never realized the full potential of myself or what should be done let alone even the drive to do something.

Well that time came and I finally had made the decision to change. There is nothing more emotionally draining than being surprised and awaken at how unhealthy, unhappy, and in-denial one may be until they finally realize something is wrong. I had a wake-up call....an epiphany, if you will, at certain family photos taken during vacations in 2002 and 2003. I could not believe how overweight I had become. I cried, by myself, when I first viewed some of those photos. It was extremely saddening and the moment was almost mystical. Afterward, I was emotionally drained, but a spark went off, and I woke up the next morning with a vigor strong enough to realize that today was the day change was going to happen. That day came November 17, 2003. The day I, for the first time in my life, was determined to succeed in not only losing weight but reversing the emotionally damaged inter-sanctum that being heavy for so many years had caused.

At this time, low-carb was at the height of media attention and all over the place. So I said, I will try that. And you know what, in simple english - IT WORKS. Sometimes hard to stick with but, yes, indeed low-carb will work.

Now let me stop here and say this..... I need to emphasize something extremely important. People need to find what works for them. Any true life-style change will work! Yes, I said any true life-style change, whether it be low-carb, or the old fashioned way, you will succeed, maybe a little faster with low carb , but you will succeed with determination and consistency. The key is “life style change”.

So to get back to my story, I read Dr. Atkins book and went to work. First thing, eliminated all sugary soft-drinks, candy, junk food, sugary sweets, and the like. The pounds started to melt away almost immediately and I was EXCITED. I had never lost weight in my life and let me tell you, the feeling is AWESOME - HELL IT’S FANTASTIC. It’s a great feeling to know that change is occurring. Well for the next month or so I stuck with it losing steadily. And eventually found this web site and used it for questions, support and motivation. Then, as with many people I waned off. Now let me interject here. I truly believe that If I had stuck with solely Atkins I would have lost faster and more consistent and reached goal weight in far faster time. But, like I emphasized in the previous paragraph, people need to find what works best for them!

Well, I strayed off but did not go back to my old habits. I continued with a semi-low carb plan of no soft-drinks, plenty of water, rarely ate any sweets or the like. My plan consisted of whole grains, vegetables, fruit and other high-fiber foods while still eliminating the killer carbs that are so bad for all of us. I basically ate healthy and started to walk. Another important fact for me was that calories counted! I had to keep them about 1800 a day so I learned to make modifications and watch everything I consumed. At first my exercise was light, a nice walk around the neighborhood. BABY STEPS are key when it comes to a fitness plan in my opinion. First-off, I never exercised a lick in my life. So this alone was a big step. Consistency is key. Yes I would have my bad days, but I jumped right back on the next.

Second point. Stay Motivated! The only way to be consistent is to, quite frankly, stay motivated which is one of the most important lessons while losing weight. I did not gain the weight over night so I did not expect to lose it that fast either. I saw it as a journey of semi-goals and realizing that yes, indeed, I had a long way to go.....the important point being that I would never get there if I did not journey, no matter how long the mileage may be. I used all the emotionally damaged self-worth deprived anger from being overweight for 20+ years as fuel that drove my conquest to win this battle. Yes, I saw it as a BATTLE... hell a WAR. I saw no other alternative but to succeed. Not only to succeed but to knockout, attack into submission victory - a sorta personal D-day conquest of my weight. It become extremely personal. As personal as anything in the world can be to a person. I wanted REVENGE. After all, I deserved it.

So I continued and the weight came off, consistently. My plan remained the same and every once in a while to stay vigorous I would go back into full-blown Atkins mode to BREAK my stalls and renew my inner-stregnth. So basically I would use Atkins as a stall-buster, as odd as this may sound. But for me, it worked. And as more weight came off, the more excited I became. I was ecstatic at how my clothes fit, how my face changed, (I finally had a jaw line!) and the subtle physical changes that occurred. The little things kept me going, the comments people would make. This all became the new fuel that made me continue this journey. And as I become thinner, I become more determined. Exercise increased from walking to speed-walking, from speed-walking to jogging and incline, and from jogging and incline, to incline and running. I added a few weight training days but mostly sit-ups and push-ups and am currently doing an hour of cardio on the treadmill at least 5 days a week. (Or I try) . Something also occurred that I would never have thought, I realized that I loved to exercise. It become relaxing to me and importantly - a way of life. That's the key, make exercise a way of life, learn to enjoy.

So time-warp to today. Sept. 2005 almost 2 years since my journey began. From a high of around 290 pounds in early 2003 I have lost approximately 150 pounds and counting, to a current weight of 139 pounds. Basically, I lost a person, or two kids. LOL. I’m not sure what goal may be, but I want to be comfortable with myself. Nowadays my goals are to increase or retain any lean body tissue and tone up to get rid of those stubborn love handles that plague anyone who has lost this much weight. And let me just say that some of the most ultimate feelings of joy and pride will take place when the new you debuts to people who won't recognize you. The feeling is awesome.


Simply, I am happier. I consider this the greatest achievement of my life. Bigger than anything I could have done in 25 years of existence. And a unique learning experience unlike anything else. Something that once you have no one can take away. Something that makes us weight-loss victors different.


Something that I can tell my grandchildren about, yes it is that important to me.

The last thing I wanted to discuss is the introspection that I have been experiencing through all of this. As I said earlier, I am very shy. I found myself through out the years developing an almost jealous like envy of others - especially of attractive good-looking socially-gifted people. The popular people I guess. I was jealous of good looking guys and girls who were able to present themselves in an emphatic demeanor. I saw myself, on the other hand, being ugly, unattractive, and dull. I think I hated myself. No, in-fact I know I did. These are inner-battles that continue within to this day. I am still in many ways envious of others, socially inept, and closed-off. One particular area being overweight has crippled me is my interactions with the opposite sex. I have always been far to shy to approach a girl that would catch my eye or girls in general. I’m like this today. Far overly self-conscious with an offset demeanor. However, the most surprising inner-change for me is not that I am more confident or outgoing, (because I’m not) it’s how I see others that has changed. I find myself defining others not by being overweight or their outer-appearances, but increasingly by their character, dynamism, and personality. I mean I still notice and, like I said, even envious of beautiful and attractive people, but realize that there are different types of beauty and in fact how subjective beauty really is. Maybe I see that even though our outer-appearances are different that people are really just people.


In many ways I am different but still the same.



Thanks for listening and all the encouraging comments.


And if you read all this I thank you from the bottom of my heart.

(phew this was longer than expected!)

Sincerely,
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  #2  
by Ayustar on Fri, Sep-16-05, 02:09
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Holy crap!!

That is amazing!!! You should be one of the greatest inspirations on here. Incredible. It is sad how everyone tries to discredit low carb when it has changed so many people's lives, affected it in a way that nothing else has.

You look amazing and your story was very heartfelt and I related to so many things you had to say.

You are very awesome and thanks for posting this.
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