YES! it doesn't make sense at all to someone that's never dealt with it. It is like a punishment to me sometimes....especially if I eat something (or too much of something) enough to make myself feel kind of sick. I have started to realize that I am not that good at handling my emotions (at times) and sometimes I use food to "deal" with them...sometimes I do other things. If I get very angry or frustrated I have (once or twice) punched something, like a wall etc. My husband was confused, like "why would you do something to hurt yourself....why does that make you feel better?" I can't explain it to him....but it's almost like I feel better to have a physical reason to be in pain instead of just a psychological reason.