Erin,

I completely know what you mean. It's weird, but I feel like other people are judging me in a negative light because I am making such a huge effort towards myself. Like somehow I'm selfish and conceited or something for spending time and effort to improve myself. Which is ironic, because these are the same people who were judging me for being fat. I really don't think it has anything to do with weight, deep down--it's all a manefestation of our insecurities.

I remember going to parties when I was a size 16 and being relieved that there were heavier girls there than me. As if somehow that made me "thinner" by comparison, so I wouldn't feel so gross. It was a way of not dealing with my own inability to control my own body (or what I percieved as a lack of control). I used to make conspicuous comments about very thin girls--like "eww, that girl is freakishly skinny" etc etc. WHich, when I think about it, is really incredibly rude and not any better than fatphobics.
I feel that my own success (in progress) losing weight makes other people feel like failures, in the same way I used to like one.
It is so sad that we all have been so manipulated by this fat thing, and have been so disconnected from what it all really means. But on the sunny side, I think all of the people here are really on their way to dealing with the real issues, realizing that it's not all about "weight." THis is a really great board, and I hope everyone finds "their way."

Gracie