I think I knew from the outset that Barbara Berkely had never been really overweight so her blog post didn't surprise me. Actually, I was pleased to read the confirmation that there are truly people that don't worry about their weight, eat what they like (including crap) and are naturally thin. Frankly, despite Lynn's earlier blogpost on it, I think that is far more common, especially in the under 40 set, than those that work really hard at keeping their weight in check.

However, I share some of your issues with her, Judy. There really are different levels of experience with obesity, maybe like the different levels of hell? While each level of a struggle with weight feels just as all-consuming and painful to each person as they are there, it doesn't change the fact that in absolute terms, there are big differences between being 20 lbs overweight and 100+ lbs overweight.

Sure, the person who is 20 lbs overweight feels the pain of that struggle deeply and it might affect her as profoundly as being 200 lbs overweight affected me, but the reality is that my experiences were probably far more terrible. And I accept that as much as my obesity defined me, molded me and was me for so long and I will always feel the pain of that, I have to admit that my experience was not as bad as the experience of someone who has been 300, 400 or 500 lbs overweight.

I'm learning to take from the Refuse to Regain blog the parts of it that I can learn from, and leave the parts that are contrary to my opinions and feelings on my journey. On many points, I don't connect with Barbara's experiences, and even with Lynn's, I notice big differences between her experience of maintenance and my own. I am reminded frequently that she is still relatively new in maintenance and after five years of it I find I'm less intense about some things than she is still.

It really is quite a personal journey, different for all of us, isn't it?