I am up at 3:00 a.m. Menopause strikes again. But--insomnia does help when the work load is heavy. And, it is Friday so I can snooze extra tomorrow. It was such a pleasant surprise to find these wonderful posts of support. Thank you so much!


Barbara, thank you...and please know that I totally realize what an absolute jewel I have in my life. I wish everyone could find, love, and dare I say it----train a good man. My husband and I have been together a long time. We've had our rough patches, but we've grown through them. I think the "secret" to our longevity is that we have tolerated and given the best support we could during each others hard/challenge times. He has had to put up with me going back to college through bachelors and masters degrees---and stayed with me as we both realized I wasn't stupid after all. AND, he didn't agree to stay with me in sickness and health with full disclosure. We knew I had eating and depression problems when we married, but we didn't know the degree of the problems. Then came the type 1 diabetes and eventually the alcoholism. On my side, I didn't understand what dreadfully BIG pains in the butt young men are. Good grief! Aren't they just the dumbest, stubbornest, know-it-alls on the planet? I am having flashbacks to those times now since my son is 25 years old. I find myself giving my DIL big hugs and knowing looks of support these days.

Oh honey! You are speaking the truth here. You are on your own amazing journey. Enjoy it!! BTW I love your name and quote. When I hear Raven I think of the wonderful Native American myths concerning the changeling creature. Fabulous power!



Cricket, my friend. I always enjoy reading your writing. You are so expressive and astute. Let me give you my condolences on your grandmother. One of my grandmothers was my true gift/source of unconditional love growing up. I mourned her death for a long time....some of it while she was still on the planet because we lost her to Alzheimer's. Since her death, she is so much a part of my everyday life. I dream of her often. I feel her heart and guidance in my everyday life. She was my angel on earth and is now in her true angelic form. Perhaps you will have the same feelings from your grandmother.

You are right about living life with experience. I know that I do sometimes convey a "been there, done that" attitude....because I have. Hopefully, everyone will live to have enough success in life to feel that on many levels.

I didn't find forums until I was well into my weight loss journey. It really helped me at the stage of my discovery. I was near goal. I now realize that I actually need the forum and online friends the most for maintenance. Weight loss provides a goal and a momentum. Living on program for the rest of your life seems overwhelming at times. Having a daily support system is essential for me. I went through a very painful time with the small forum I used last year. I absolutely love the people, but I didn't have enough of what I needed for my stage of this experience. I think the people there cared for me, but they couldn't understand and/or give me support for the stage I'm in. It made me realize that ultimately we have to take responsibility for preserving what we need for recovery. If we are in a circumstance that is threatening our weight loss and food addiction recovery, we have to try to change it....and get out if necessary. Even if it means walking out on people we love. I found that incredibly painful. I'm sorry to say that I probably left people confused and hurt. Perhaps they will reach a level of weight loss success one day to understand what I did. Some have communicated to me that they support me even if they don't quite understand---they just know I felt it was essential to my abstinence and they are true friends enough to put aside their opinions in order to support my sincerity.

I tell that story because I agree with you so much that we learn through the low times. And that applies so much to our common place of the battle with obesity. In AA it is taught that you can't live your life with the same "people, places, and things" that you did when you are abusing alcohol/drugs. BUT as food addicts (compulsive overeaters) we are expected to do just that. Well you know what? I can't. and I don't. I honestly do not attend social functions which make me clench with tension....for me that is cocktail parties, dinner parties, showers ( I do send exceptionally nice gifts which is what they really want anyway) covered-dish meals. The food is only a small part of the discomfort for me. I just honestly hate those kind of things. When you don't eat at events like that, you spend a lot of time standing around with nothing to do and no one who really wants to talk with you...they think the non-eater is judging them even if we are not. I also cannot spend a lot of time with people that go on and off diets, food talkers, or Eeyores (gloom and doom personalities). These are the some of the biggest things I learned in AA that cross over to help me with food addiction.

The biggest thing I learned in AA was that "God" (the higher power of my understanding) wants me to be "happy, joyous, and free." Now THAT is an amazing revelation.

Enough of my esoteric rambling.
Have a great day everybody.
And Oh Yeah: I am going to be taking my chameleon, James Bond, to the exotic vet today. He is dehydrated and incredibly constipated. And we thought *we* had troubles!!!!
Sara<><