Nice to meet you, MammaD10. I'm from the south and when I read your name it registered in my brain as "Mama and Dem." That is a common greeting we give to friends 'round here....as in, How's ya Mama and Dem? Translation: your nuclear family. Anyway, due to the familiarity of your name I feel "right close to ya" already.
Pennink, as to your question...Honey, my man is a man...if there was a rise in his libido neither of us would get anything done!!!! In fact, I have commented that if we get any hotter, we may have to quit our jobs! The answer is that he hasn't gotten any "randier" (tactfully put!), I HAVE!! I'm sure I can't be the only woman that was this way, but I was put off by my own body when I was a fat mama. I had emotional layers of protection equal to the fat layers. I could NOT relax. Losing the weight made a BIG difference in that. We both got off on me
That sounds funny, but it is the truth. I think men can feel sexy regardless of the way they look, for the most part. Want an example of that? How many times has your man done the wiener wagging dance at you when he got out of the shower? Please!!! It is obvious that he feels just so good about himself without caring a lick that he looks like a goofball! I think women need to find themselves sexually attractive in order to feel sexually attractive. No, this doesn't require becoming a bisexual!
I just mean that we want to look good in our own minds.
Let's talk about skin flaps and G-strings. This past Christmas, as it happens, my husband and I each put sexy underwear in each other's stockings. (You can imagine the eye rolling from my son and daughter-in-law!) Now, I put a lot of thought into his underwear selection. I ordered it online from Undergear and made sure each piece would be sexy yes, but also comfortable and flattering. What about mine? Five tiny (size 5) G-strings!!! Please! Now, I'll grant you that he meant this in a flattering way...and probably had my upcoming surgery in mind, but there was no well in hel* that I was gonna do a dance for him in those!!! I told him, "Sweetie, these are wonderful, but you know I will not be putting these on until way after my surgery this summer. I would hate for them to get buried and lost in my skin folds." And I meant it. I coulda put those drawers on and he would have NEVER seen them. They would have tucked up under my skin!!! I stuck them over in a corner of my panty drawer never expecting to pop the tags. I would have felt like a fool in them!
Then, it happened. I didn't swell quite as much from the surgery as I expected. In fact, my body looks BETTER than I thought it would. One day, while he was outside doing that weird piddlin' around that he does (I think it is the 50-year-old man equivalent of playing in the dirt with Tonka trucks), I decided to just see what would happen if I put on a pair of those dinky things. I was soooo surprised. I didn't look like a fool. They didn't immediately roll down under belly/skin 'cause there was no belly/skin. I looked in the mirror and saw a STUNNED 48-year-old woman---wearing a damn G-string! Good Lord!
Seven years ago I had a breast reduction. That changed me sexually. I mean it! Ain't no way I could enjoy sex with all those big ole' boobs a-flyin' and a-flappin' every which a-way. Three years ago I became sober and began losing significant amounts of weight. I opened up even more sexually. I reached goal, and the sex was much better. I mean, let's be honest and graphic here---a thin man and thin woman can CONNECT better, okay! But, there was this whole skin thing! Me on top with all of that loose skin? You have got to be joking?! Then came the day that I was going up the stairs wearing a polka-dotted G-string while my man was passing by. I stopped and did the female equivalent of the post-shower wiener dance!!
I felt good about my little self!!! I also felt grateful to my man for seeing the sexy woman inside of me before I could.
Phew! Let me close this....I think I need to take a shower!
Sara<><